


The Gym Au

by Miss_Rust



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Anxiety, Fluff, Gym AU, Jon Snow is Catelyn and Ned Stark's Son, Jon Snow is a Stark, Jon has Anxiety, Jon is not dealing well with stressfull situations, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pining, Robb is a good big brother, Slow Burn, Strangers to Lovers, Uni stress hits hard in this one, he is robbs twin to be exact, meddling siblings
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-26
Updated: 2020-05-23
Packaged: 2020-07-20 10:19:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 23,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19990522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miss_Rust/pseuds/Miss_Rust
Summary: "Jon always picked the worst people to fall in love with. Your personal trainer, though ? That was torture."





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> One giant thank you to Chrissy (aka thighs-without-mercy on tumblr) for betaing me !  
> All remaining mistakes are probably mine because I keep tempering with it sometimes.

Jon was tired. Tired because he was preparing for his exams, and tired, because he was currently trying to lug his groceries up the stairs, were they always this high?

Out of breath, Jon reached his floor, the 4th of the building and entered the flat he shared with his friends Sam Tarly and Edd Tollett. Living in halls turned out to be very convenient, if not only for the costs but also the fun of having people around that were always willing for a chat or a few games.

It was now his second year of living in halls, and his second semester studying law. He decided to go after his father Ned Stark, who was leading his law firm ‘Stark’ and Associates with his ex-boyfriend and best friend Howland Reed. Uncle Howland had played a big role in his coming to terms with his sexuality and had always had an open ear and a helping hand ready when Jon asked. He was hoping he might get to work with them after finishing up his degree. He already accepted a training contract with them so that he doesn’t have to pay for his legal practice course.

Sam, his best friend from back home, was doing medicine after his father had disowned him because he didn’t want to take part in his family’s history of joining the army. Edd was currently attempting a degree in economics and management, after realising being in the police force just wasn’t his thing at all.

Both of his friends were currently sitting at the kitchen table, curiously eyeing the way Jon was huffing and trying to catch his breath, holding himself against the doorframe.

“Somebody has gone out of shape”, laughed Edd, finally rising to help Jon carry the groceries into the flat all the way. 

“It’s not my fault somebody wanted to have _six cartons of milk_ to attempt latte art, Edd, why do you even need to do that? It’s so heavy” Jon accused, starting to stack the groceries in their shared shelving units.

“All right all right, no need to be sarcastic! It’s for a project, you know the ‘learn a trade workshop thing I told you about? I chose barista because why not, also, you’ll benefit because I make your coffee every morning! Honestly though, you could come with me to the gym! It’ll get you back into shape and you could wingman me! There’s this dude, his name’s Grenn and- “

“And he’s beautiful and you want his babies, we know,” Sam interrupted Edd, “No need to harass Jon because you’re too shy to talk to him! If Jon wants to go to the gym, he probably wouldn’t want to do it to help you get a date. You’re perfectly capable of flirting and you absolutely don’t need help with this!”

Jon laughed. Edd had been going on about his crush on Grenn for ages now, never making a move because one, he kept putting himself down as not worthy enough because he was nowhere near as ripped as Grenn was, and two, because he was generally a very grumpy and sarcastic being and Grenn really wasn’t. He also absolutely did not want to talk to him because he didn’t want to fuck it up by being too sarcastic, something that was programmed to happen.

Jon thought that Grenn really wouldn’t care about that and actually find him funny, because Edd just was, and if he didn’t see that he was a dick. Also, he didn’t really think Edd needed a wingman, because Edd was perfectly capable of getting dates, as he had demonstrated over the past year whenever they visited any party they were invited to. Although would it really come down to it, there’s nowhere in hell where he wouldn’t go help Edd if he really needed him. He just wanted to give him the chance to even attempt talking to him first, because it seemed like he still hadn’t tried to even do that.

He told Edd as much and exchanged a view with Sam when Edd started lamenting about how he could never attempt to talk to Grenn after some kind of fiasco with a water bottle.

Jon didn’t even want to ask, too tired to listen to him ramble on and on. He just wanted to go to bed, after having spent half his day in lectures and the other half in library, working on an essay he had to hand in tomorrow. If he went to bed now, he could get up early and go over it again before handing it in comfortably early, his essay was nearly finished by now. The deadline was at noon, so he had plenty of time.

By the time he was in bed though, the thought of going to the gym had taken root. He thought back to how he ended up here, seemingly having lost a great deal of his strength. He wasn’t chubby, but he supposed that after he finished high school and went on to university, he really had let himself go a bit. Relishing in the freedom of being able to buy his own food and partying a couple of times a month and not having PE certainly did its toll on his endurance. He didn’t mind exercise, in fact he even enjoyed playing rugby with his twin brother Robb at school, but his university didn’t offer rugby and the first semester of studying law was so stressful and thus he never really read into what else they offered.

He supposed Edd was, in fact, right about joining a fitness centre to up his strength a bit. It really couldn’t hurt, and he also never really went to a gym before, so he could just count it as a new experience.

Motivated, he got up again and started looking for gyms on his computer, certainly avoiding Edd’s and Grenn’s gym, not wanting to be forever mixed up in his best friends love life, which he had told him so a couple of times already.

By the end of it all, ‘Free Folk Fitness’ was the one that caught his attention with low prices and a special offer for students to get a personal trainer for 6 months. This was something that he felt might be important because he really didn’t want to fuck up due to misusing the machines, which was bound to happen due to him never having been there.

A personal trainer might also have ideas about how he could become less, how could he say, slobby in general, concerning food. It was the best offer he could find, so he resolved to go visit them after he handed in his essay tomorrow at noon.


	2. Chapter 2

** Chapter 2: **

It was 3 o’clock already, Jon had handed in an essay at uni last minute. Now, he was stood in front of Free Folk Fitness, fighting his flight or fight instinct and trying to gather the courage to go inside.

The godforsaken essay was about company law, a topic he found specifically confusing. So when he had found a crucial error on his last read through and had to spent the rest of the morning on redoing that part of his essay, he was almost late by the time he had finished it, and handed it in at exactly two minutes before 12 o’clock, Professor Seaworth tutting at him from behind his desk.

Having handed in his essay later than he had planned didn’t help his anxiety and he wished for nothing more than to lie down in his bed and never come out of it again. He knew though, that all that would help him in this moment, would be to successfully do another thing he could be proud of, to offset his panic over his late essay.

Jon’s fight response won over and he entered the building, walking up to the front desk where a young redheaded lady who looked about his own age was sat looking a bit bored, reading something on her computer screen.

When Jon greeted her, she looked up shortly, nodded, and with a gesture of ‘I’ll be with you shortly’, returned to typing. She was wearing a polo shirt in the colour of the Gym Logo, an awfully bright turquoise with grey accents, and a name tag that read ‘Ygritte Giantsbane’.

He looked around while she worked. The place was relatively modern, grey concrete floors with exposed copper pipes gave the gym an industrial look. There were many machines and not that many people, but he considered that was because of the time of day.

He gladly noted that not all of the training people were jacked, there was a wild mix of men and women in all shapes and sizes. Jon was relieved to see that, it was one of the things he was insecure about, being judged for how he was. He supposed he got distracted a bit because he jumped when the woman finally looked up and addressed him.

“Sorry for the wait, how can I help you?”

Jon tried to cover up his being startled but didn’t quite succeed, stumbling his way through his sentences. He internally cursed himself for not paying attention, still a bit tired from his nerve-racking essay experience.

“Hi, yeah, I’m Jon, I wanted to sign up for a membership? I’ve never done this before, and I researched you and you had this offer up for students? The one with the personal trainer for 6 months?”

“Hi Jon!” Ygritte laughed, not unkindly. 

“Yeah seems like you’re in luck! That offer runs out today but don’t get your panties in a twist! “ 

Jon sighed, relieved he hadn’t procrastinated going and given in to his want of just hiding in his bed for the remainder of the day.

“If you can just fill this out and then well get on to basics and if they’re free I can introduce you to your trainer already!” she continued, gathering up what seemed like a mountain of forms and shoving it into his arms, extending a pen into his general direction.

“You can sit over there, don’t worry most of that is just precautionary stuff about injury and such.”

Jon thanked her and sat down, skimming over the documents, taking a while to notice if there were any legalities in there that he didn’t agree with. There wasn’t really anything, most of the stuff was just about not suing the gym if you injured yourself out of your own stupidity or ensuring that the trainers would be paid even if you were sick.

There was also a lot of stuff concerning cancelling and one phrase that specifically caught his attention;

”A romantic relationship between a supervisor and a client can create a problem of favouritism, relating claims of discrimination, and even more complications if the client claims the relationship was non-consensual. As such a relationship between a personal trainer and trainee cannot be allowed. If there isn’t a specific contract binding the supervisor to the client, such as in a personal trainer arrangement, a relationship is not prohibited, although we would be respectfully be asking all employees to notify management if they are entering a consenting relationship. This notification is necessary to protect the company from charges that the relationship was not consensual. All data is protected and will not be given out to any other parties…”

“You’re taking an awful lot of time to sign a couple of papers, pretty boy.” Ygritte’s voice interrupted his musings from somewhere across the room, all while blatantly flirting with him, a thing he had tried to ignore earlier but now couldn’t anymore, especially considering the text he just read.

“My name’s Jon, and I’m gay so there’s no use to flirt with me, Ygritte!” Jon took the risk of outing himself directly, knowing that it maybe wouldn’t be such a good idea to be ‘out’ in a gym of all places, but he gathered if he did it right up front he’d notice if there could be issues in the future. All his fears were unfounded though, because when he looked up, he saw Ygritte just smiling at him relaxed.

“All right, Jon,”, and it did seem alright the way she continued; “but you’ll always stay a pretty boy with a face like that”.

Ygritte pointed to the wall behind her where he now noticed a pride flag hung next to a poster; 

“As you can see we have a bicycle night on Thursdays where all proceeds go a queer charity the participators agree on, so you’ll be right at home here! Free Folk is exactly that, for people, with people, so you’ll notice everybody is generally very accepting of each other. Unless you’re a dick of course, but I don’t see that happening with you pretty boy.”

Jon smiled at her gratefully, glad that he chose this gym. He felt like he’d be at home here.

“Truly though, what’s taking you so long with signing those? Are you actually reading through the t’s and c’s?” Ygritte asked.

Jon finished signing all the papers and then handed them back to her with a wry smile.

“I’m a law student,” he explained “it’s a reflex at this point to read through everything I might have to sign.”

Ygritte looked at him, astonished, and then broke out into a full belly laugh. “Always on the watch, pretty boy! Honestly, we all probably should read through our terms and conditions, but I must admit I haven’t really read through any I’ve signed. For all I know I could have promised some shady website my first born!” she deadpanned.

Jon chuckled. This woman seemed to have her wits together, he liked her humour and he could see himself becoming friends with her very quickly sometime in the future.

“And that’s exactly why you should always read them! “Jon smiled.

“Alright, pretty lawyer, I’ve got your data so let’s get you set with personal trainer! Let’s see…” Ygritte focused back on her screen, apparently flicking through a schedule of some kind.

“So, what days would you usually be wanting to train?” she asked, looking up at him

Jon hummed thoughtfully. “I have uni in the mornings so any afternoon would be awesome, and I’m not really fussed about the days, I’m sure there’s some plan you have to follow which days you rest and such, right?” Jon replied, scratching his head. He’d accept anything they’d throw at him; he made a deal with himself. Anything they deemed as necessary to increase his strength he would do.

“All right, yeah, you’re right about that! I have a slot free with Tormund, Tuesdays Thursdays and Saturdays at 5pm each day, or you can do Monday Wednesday and Friday with the weekend free, with Sandor Clegane. If you decide to do mornings, I can set you up with Jaime Lannister, at 6am, but since you are at university, I don’t think that’s an option.” Ygritte

Jon pulled a face. Six in the morning? Who does that? Apparently, some trainer called Jaime Lannister. He wondered if he was related to Tyrion Lannister, who was a couple years his senior and had just started working at his father’s law firm.

He decided he’d go with his first options, because while he liked his weekend free, he intensely disliked having to work out on a Monday, besides, at least he would be doing something if he had a lazy weekend. 

He told Ygritte as much, and when they finally had wrapped up paying and Ygritte started introducing him to a couple of general rules, such as ‘don’t be a dick, ask when you want to train at a machine after the person who uses it right now, don’t insult people, don’t harass people and as Ygritte said, most important one ‘ask for help if you need it’.

Ygritte then got up from behind the counter and started walking him around the compound, showing him where everything was, from the men’s locker rooms to showers and the bar where you could buy drinks and snacks. There turned out to be a lot of facilities, such as gender-neutral locker rooms, showers and toilets, but also an on-side physiotherapist as well as a massage therapist. There also was a sauna.

Jon marvelled at the fitness studio, it seemed like he made the right call! He was so engrossed looking around the studio he didn’t notice the man approaching them until Ygritte called out:

“Tormund! I have a new recruit for you to torment!”, she grinned ferally at the man who had just stopped in front of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading ! Leave kudos or a comment if you like it!


	3. Chapter 3

Jon needed to stop gaping he told himself internally, taking in the tall, muscular man in front of him.

He was at least a head taller than him, with flaming red hair just like Ygritte’s he had pulled back into a bun (were they related? He distantly remembered them sharing a last name), wearing sweatpants and sporting one of those turquoise grey shirts apparently all employees wore albeit one a bit sportier than the polo Ygritte had.

The trainer also had a full beard framing his face and dark blue eyes that had a twinkle in them as he mustered Jon. He couldn’t possibly gauge his age, but he did seem quite young so Jon would guess he was in his 20s.

All in all, he made a very attractive, but also quite imposing figure, so Jon was slightly nervous when the man shook his hand and started introducing himself to him.

“Hi, I’m Tormund, seems like my little sister has set me up to be your trainer for the next 6 months! Who do I have the pleasure of meeting? “he grinned at Jon, showing a row of perfectly straight white teeth.

Jon cursed himself to get his bearing and stop the nervous flush from rising higher than it already was. He was a Stark, he wouldn’t back down now, so he gritted his teeth against his nervousness.

He didn’t know if it was because of his attraction (stop it Jon, he told himself, you can’t crush on your future personal trainer! It would be at least 6 months until you’d even be able to pursue that, you’re bound by a contract!) or his general anxiety of meeting new people and being thrown into a completely new environment.

“I’m Jon Stark, it’s lovely meeting you”, He tried smiling back at his future trainer, hoping he didn’t look like he was grimacing too much.

They shook hands. Tormund had a firm, encouraging grip and his hands were nearly engulfing Jon’s. As he let go, he noticed a lot of callouses, probably from his constant use of training machines.  
Tormund smiled at him and gathered his forms from Ygritte.

“All right then, let’s get you set up, shall we? It’s not actually your slot until 4, but you’re lucky my three o’clock has taken ill, so I have a little time to set you up properly!”

Tormund companionably patted his shoulder and left his hand on his back, leading him towards one of the rooms off to the side. Ygritte gave him the thumbs up while she returned to her station.

They arrived in a small room, what was essentially a kind of office where Tormund offered him a chair, a glass of water and then sat down behind his desk.

“Welcome to my lair, Jon Snow,” he said, booting up his computer, “Tell me a bit about yourself? I’d like to know your motivation behind all this, your goals, wishes, anything you specifically want to improve on, be it diet, strength, weight or just general appearances. Have you exercised before? What have you tried, what worked or didn't work? Any injuries or illnesses we have to work around? What's your diet, sleep and stress level like? Do you take any supplements?”

Tormund picked up a pen and a sheet of paper and looked at him expectantly, but not unkindly.

Thus, a bit less tense, Jon started telling Tormund his story how he got there, from leaving school, stopping rugby, loosing track of what he was eating and just generally becoming a desk sitter because of his studies. He didn’t have any injuries or illnesses, and his diet was pretty much just what he wanted to eat that day.

“I’d love to get myself back to track, essentially, but I honestly would like to go a bit further than that and gain some more strength. I don’t really care about my weight to be honest as long as I’m healthy. I just don’t really have any concept about where to start, and I thought the Gym would be the best place do that” he explained, hoping he didn’t sound like an idiot for not trying for himself at first.

Uncle Howland had always preached to him and his siblings about asking for help rather sooner than later, and so had his father and following their advice was never wrong so here he was.

Tormund hummed, taking notes on a sheet of paper, asking after a couple of specifics but he seemed quite happy with what Jon was telling him.

“That will be no problem. I can help you with a lot of that, and we’ll get you back on track very quickly if you want to. I’ll set you up with a nutrition plan later according to the workouts we’ll do, don’t worry, there will be a lot of options but getting where you want to be physically its usually 80% nutrition and 20% the right workout. “Tormund explained, then laughed. “that doesn’t mean I’m going to go easy on you though”

Jon smiled “I’m not expecting you to”

“Glad were on the same page, then,” the redhead said, “Is it all right if I take your measurements? I need those to see if my training works the way I intend it to. It’s all right if you don’t want to know them but they’re essential to me, so I can control where we are heading with this.”

Jon quickly agreed, and Tormund got up from behind his chair and started measuring out his body from his thighs to his arms. Up close, he could see Tormund had a lot of freckles across his face, blue, determined eyes taking in his body scrutinizingly. Jon swore nobody had ever looked at his body in such a thorough way and it made him a bit flustered.

He had gotten over his initial shock of Tormund’s attractiveness, resolving to be completely professional about this. He wasn’t here to find a significant other (especially considering the company law against relationships with your trainer), he was here to become stronger and healthier.

Right at that moment Tormund started measuring his upper left thigh, and Jon had to control his breathing.  
So much for being professional about this, he had already developed a crush in a matter of only half an hour. He groaned internally. He hoped nothing on his face betrayed his emotions as Tormund reached his right bicep, standing close enough for Jon to see Tormund individual beard hairs.

Tormund furrowed his eyebrows in complete concentration, taking in his measurements and writing them down on Jon’s sheet of paper. He wondered if his trainer went to a barber, self-consciously rubbing at his own, he hadn’t visited his own in a while, but it was still well kept so he hadn’t felt the need to go recently.

Tormund’s beard was entirely grand though. Ginger full beard, slightly curly and slightly darker than the hair in his ponytail.

Suddenly, Tormund was finished and ripped him from his thoughts, by asking him to step on the scales. When that was done too, they sat down again, his trainer still fully focused on his stats.

Jon self-consciously rubbed at his tummy; his unease having returned in full.  
“Shall we get to it then? So usually what I do for first timers is set them up on a basic training, see what you can do, what you’re comfortable with and what you still need, so the first workout probably won’t be as good as the ones that are coming up.”

Tormund explained, looking at him earnestly.

Jon nodded, nervous, now that his actual training was imminent.  
They got up, and Tormund lead him out to a couple of machines. Jon was glad he was already in workout gear so that they could get started immediately. Waiting usually just made his anxiety worse.

The Ginger started him on a warmup, correcting his posture here and there, explaining exactly which muscles were being engaged and how he could avoid injury.

Jon started to relax; this was something that he could do. And he didn’t feel uncomfortable, he enjoyed learning more about his body!

Tormund made him go through a couple more exercises before finally deeming him warmed up enough to start checking how flexible he was.

He claimed, when Jon asked why, that it was essential to assess his range of motion and find out any over- or underactive muscles to see if it affected any of his movements or posture in general.  
This would be important to any later exercises he would put Jon through, as he didn’t want to risk injuring his client.

Quickly, Jon and Tormund fell into a comfortable rhythm, making their way through all of the exercises, both working up a sweat as they trained alongside each other.

Jon felt the adrenaline rising slowly in his veins and let the feeling take over, giving himself into the flow. Now that he was here, actually doing it, being in a gym of all places, it no longer felt like it was too much for Jon to handle. His anxiety faded and he didn’t really feel intimidated anymore. Of course, this was all still new, and he didn’t really do well with change, but this was alright.

Tormund still felt a bit intimidating to him even though it had changed from when he first met him, not even an hour ago. It made Jon feel a bit funny, the way he was watching Jon from the side-lines so intensely, looking a bit like a hawk.

It wasn’t very often that men he found incredibly attractive blessed him with their undivided attraction, even if it was in a completely professional surrounding.

Despite of his intimidation, he found that Tormund was funny in the way he explained things to Jon, taking the time to smile and encourage his questions.

What had seemed like such a daunting task transformed itself into something a lot more manageable under his trainer’s attention. Maybe he could even learn to have fun doing this!

Twenty minutes later, Jon regretted every decision that had led him into the gym, trying to regulate his breathing. Tormund relentlessly went on and on, pushing Jon through every exercise and not letting up.

Sweat was dripping off his forehead, around his back and front and made his shirt cling to him in a very uncomfortable way.

The most awful thing though, was his hair. His hair was sticking to his neck and forehead, because he hadn’t bothered to put it into a ponytail before starting.

While it barely touched his shoulders usually, he could still get a decent bun out of it due to his curls. He wondered how long his hair might be if he straightened it, raising up his hand to brush it out of his face for the what seemed like the 100th time.

Finally, Tormund relented. Before Jon knew it, he had passed 45 minutes of rigorous exercising, a 15-minute warm up and flexibility check-up, with only minor breaks thrown in for him to catch his breath.

Jon felt exhilarated, but tired. He smiled at Tormund while he was leading Jon through a gentle warm down.

They stopped, and Jon let out a long sigh, letting the exhaustion take over his body.  
Somehow, even though the workout turned out to be quite intense, he was happy. The adrenaline had burned the stress away. He was looking forward to taking a shower and going home to sink into his bed.

Tomorrow was Friday, and apart from a group revision session at 11 he didn’t have anything planned, so he could sleep for a very long time.

Tormund interrupted his musings by leading him back into his little office.

“Did you enjoy your session?” he asked, looking at him earnestly.

“Yeah, I did, contrary to everything I expected today! I like how you explain all of the muscle groups and things.” Jon answered, looking up at him while they walked.

“All right! That sounds great, I tried my best. I think you may enjoy your Saturday session even more because then I’ll have planned everything to fit your needs. Today was just the trial!”

Tormund opened the door to his office and let him in, offering him a seat once more.

“Very well, then. Now all there’s left to do is for you to sign over this paper, that’s the contract that binds me as your personal trainer. You’re a law student, right? Something tells me you’re gonna read every little word on this.” He laughed.

Jon nodded sheepishly and blushed a little, hoping his curls covered his red ears.

“Right then, I’m gonna leave you to it for a while, I need to check something with Ygritte.” He stood, and left Jon in his office by himself.

Picking up the contract, Jon started reading through it, again noting the passage about the relationship.

That was probably going to be tough on him he thought, considering how attractive Tormund was. Then again, he wasn’t about to enter a relationship with him, he didn’t even know if Tormund did find him attractive at all.

And, looking wasn’t forbidden, was it? If he stopped himself from deepening his crush, he’d be alright. Pining about someone else wasn’t something he should do, considering his workload. He didn’t want the added emotional stress, so he resolved to try and stop his crush from taking deeper root.

By the time that Tormund arrived back into the room, Jon was nearly done reading it, and yet Tormund started to laugh.

“You’re a right lawyer boy, Jon. Ygritte told me you did the same thing with the general stuff!” he laughed heartily, “Now don’t look at me with them pretty eyes and go back to signing that stuff!

Jon grumbled into his beard, willing his blush to go away and went back to signing his contract.

When he was done, Tormund took it, skimmed it over and then put his signature right next to Jon’s, swirling big letters next to Jon’s smaller scrawling.

“There, that’s done! I am happy that you chose me, by the way! There’s a healthy competition going on between us trainers, you’ll notice. Its like teams, we measure ourselves by how fast we can accomplish our client’s goals.”

Tormund smiled at him rising from his seat.

“I am glad too, it seems so easy when you show me things, nothing at all like I expected.” Jon returned the smile.

They shook hands, still smiling at each other.

Suddenly, as if shook out of a trance, Tormund pulled back his hand, and scratched behind his back.

“I’m sorry for keeping you so long! If you want there’s showers over there, I’m sure Ygritte already showed you them!”

Jon looked to the clock and noted that it was already nearly half-past five now.

“That’s no problem, Tormund, I don’t have anything else to do today, so the only one who might be kept is you” he retorted, grinning at his trainer.

“Ah, that’s good then! You’re right, but I don’t have any client until 6 so I’m gonna get some rest for now! I’ll be seeing you on Saturday, then, 5 o’clock straight!”

“Right. Enjoy your rest! See you Saturday!” Jon said, waving a bit as he walked away.

As he walked by Ygritte he answered her questioning face with a thumbs up, and called out a ‘see you’.

The sun hit his face when he left the gym, and he breathed in deeply. That was a satisfying end to a very stressful day. If his past self would hear that he enjoyed, actually enjoyed this, it would probably laugh at him.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! I know it's been a while, but here you are with a little update! 
> 
> Thank you to Chrissy (aka thighs-without-mercy on Tumblr) for betaing me!

It was exactly one week after, and Jon was already making progress. The main thing he noticed was that he lost a little weight, but that was probably due to his new eating habits rather than the training. Tormund had given him a nutrition plan when they had met on Saturday, alongside his number.

“Call me when you have any problems, need to cancel or anything else, yeah? It makes interactions easier, like when you’re late or something. I’ve got WhatsApp, don’t worry, you don’t need to call me every time, that just makes me anxious sometimes” Tormund had smiled had him, and Jon wondered if he did this to every client of his.

And yet, he did put his trainers’ number into his phone, and send off a text to him later that night, so that Tormund had his as well.  
Tormund had put him on a schedule, each day had a different focus, although the main exercises remained pretty similar.  
Tuesday’s training focused on core training, Thursday’s was arms and Saturday featured the widely feared leg day. 

Today though, after training, Jon had planned to attend the bike session thing Ygritte had told him about. Apparently, you could donate some money if you wanted, and today’s charity was one supporting LGBTQ+ disabled people. 

This was an issue he especially loved to put himself behind, for one, because his baby brother Bran recently came out to their family as pansexual. Jon had known it before everybody else because Bran had asked him for advice ages ago.  
Jon was out since he was 14 when Bran was just a little boy. Of course, Dad was bisexual too, but he supposed Bran didn’t realise that since he was together with their mum.  
So, when Bran had come to him and asked him all questions he could think off (as per usual, he was such a curious child) Jon had kept his secret for some time. They grew pretty close after that. 

And then the accident happened. A drunk driver had crashed his car onto the sidewalk, where Bran was coming home from school on his bike. It was one of the hardest times for their family. Bran was left paralysed from the hip down.

He grew quieter, so much that the only people he would talk to where their mum and Jon. Catelyn had done everything to make Bran feel better.  
The house was now completely wheelchair accessible, so that Bran could get around by himself.

Bran would love to hear about this charity, Jon reckoned.  
As he put down his bag next to a bike in one of the last rows, so that he could view the entire room, he casually let his gaze wander across it.

Apparently, a lady called Val led the bike sessions, she usually led the Yoga class as Ygritte had clarified when Jon had asked after time and place on Tuesday.  
He assumed the lean blonde woman fiddling with the music console in the front was her.  
Slowly the room filled up, there were at least 30 bikes, and most of them already had someone by them.

Jon’s heart made a funny jump. Three rows in front of him, he saw a familiar redhead set up next to a bike.

He had finished training with him 2 hours ago and then went on to get dinner in town with Sam and Gilly.  
Returning to the studio, he had forgotten entirely that his trainer could be there as well. 

But, did that mean?  
Or maybe he was just here because his work demanded it.  
He didn’t know any of the other trainers yet, but he didn’t see any grey-blue shirts. 

Now that he thought about that, Tormund was not wearing his usual work shirt.  
So either he just supported the cause, went because he needed more cardio (why would he though, Tormund trained the whole day) so that only left the possibility that he might be LGBT+ too.

Jon’s heart didn’t calm down, and his tummy fluttered weirdly.  
He wanted to know, and yet he didn’t want to call attention to himself by calling out to him. 

So he put his head down and waited for the class to start, occasionally glancing up to the front, where Tormund was now animatedly chatting to the blond girl.

His suspicions that she was indeed Val were affirmed when she introduced herself to the group.  
“Hi people! I see it’s full today! I’m Val, you might know me from Yoga class! My girlfriend and I lead this session in turn, so you might see her around sometimes too!  
Anyways, today’s charity is sponsoring LGBT+ disabled people! You can leave any donations when you exit after the session!” 

“For all those new faces I see today, this session is gonna last an hour with some great music playing, its usually gay club music to get your hearts pumping and set the tone!  
“As always, set your own tempo! It’s okay to take breaks; you do you!”

And then the music started. Todrick Hall blasting at club noise level while 26 people started treading in unison. Jon had counted, to distract himself from his nervousness.

Val occasionally shouted motivating things into their direction, and Jon tried very hard not to glance at Tormund’s ass too often. That man had an ass on him; it should be illegal.  
He had never really noticed because Tormund rarely stood backwards to him, but now he couldn’t keep his eyes away.

Blast this. He was barely a week into this. Keep your eyes to yourself, Jon, he thought. No better way to lose focus on his actual task than a crush. Was he behaving like Edd already? The Grenn front was still empty, and Edd was still pining hard. 

Jon let his thoughts trail, slowly trampling away, he tried to avoid losing his breath too fast.  
Biking was a lot of fun, now that he got into it. The music was still blasting, and the bodies around him started getting sweaty. It was in the essence of it, basically just like a gay club, and instead of dancing, you were on a bike. 

Before he knew it, it was over, and he got off the bike starting to pack his things while listening to Val announce the charity for next week, something about support for a transgender homeless foundation.

A voice interrupted Val’s announcement. Jon took a minute to realise that it was him being addressed. He looked up, a bit dazed from exhaustion, at the redhead in front of him who was looking at him questioning.

“What?” he apologised, “I’m sorry I was a bit spaced out and didn’t notice you.” He blushed. God damn it why did he always have to blush when attractive men asked him things?

“That’s all right,” Tormund answered and laughed a bit, “I wanted to know if you enjoyed the session.” 

“I did enjoy it! Is it usually so full?”

“That depends, but yeah it is. Free folk Fitness is known to be one of the best gyms for LGBT people, so the bike session is very popular with the clients.” Tormund said, shouldering his bag, while Jon packed his up.

Jon gathered all the courage he had ever possessed, and tried to sound very, very normal and not at all too interested (all while keeping his head down and focused on packing up his back).  
“Why do you attend, then? Did you need some more cardio after all the training we did today, or do you just support the cause?” he said, finally looking up at his trainer.

“Ah, no, I am not that much of a fitness junkie” Tormund laughed, “this is purely for fun. I am pan myself, so I attend the LGBT things regularly. Aren’t you bi or something as well? I think I overheard you talking to Ygritte on your first day?”

Oh, fuck. He is pan. He likes men. Internally freaking out, Jon tried not to listen to the voice telling him how hopeful his trainer sounded asking if he was bi, trying to quench what could now arguably be described as, desire. 

“Uh, yeah, I am gay, Ygritte noticed me checking out the posters for this thing,” Jon said, avoiding to tell Tormund about the flirting bit, since, that was still forbidden. 

Fucking hell. What the ever-loving hell am I going to do about this? I am legally bound to like, not do anything for another six months.  
“Aye, yeah the posters are pretty big, and this charity is great too! I am glad you enjoyed it, Jon!” Tormund said, smiling down at him. 

Jon smiled back until Tormund turned around, when someone called his name, and to hurry the fuck up.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I got to run, there is a team meeting tonight, so see you on Saturday!” Tormund called, clapped him on the shoulder while Jon said goodbye to him and then turned to leave, weaving his way through the bikes just to turn around at the door and wave at him again.

Jon sighed. This would be a lot more complicated than he thought. His trainer was actually pan, very attractive and kind. And he had already fallen for him, even though it was forbidden.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did a thing instead of doing uni work!
> 
> Thank you to the lovely Szamanita for encouraging me and also betaing me!

Jon’s phone was ringing. It rarely ever did.  
It was his 5th week at training, and they were currently going through leg reps. They had been joking about some mindless thing, teasing Sandor Clegane from afar, as he had a new client, some really young girl trying desperately to flirt with him.  
She probably hadn’t read the terms and conditions. 

It was all good and relaxed, Tormund had invited him for the second time to come around for drinks with his friends after training since they all had an early evening. 

But now his phone was ringing. He never got any phone calls, so if he did, in fact, get called, it was something significant. Jon’s mind suddenly was everywhere and nowhere, trying to find out what could be happening, did he forget anything? Or was it just his dad trying to check up on him?

He picked up his phone and immediately blanched. That was his supervisor, Davos Seaworth. 

Fuck.

The presentation. 

They had a case presentation at 7, on the other end of the city, and he forgot.  
He had like one hour to get there, hadn’t showered, and his presentation notes where at home. He would be late as fuck. 

He picked up. 5 minutes later, after he had endured a small lecture by Davos which essentially boiled down to ‘be here or else.’, he hung up in shock.  
Davos rarely got angry at him, but this was important, so he was understandably upset.  
How the hell did he forget this?  
If he were late, he’d fail this course, and lead down his teammates. They worked on this case for like, weeks.

He was feeling sick, paralysed with a mix of anxiety and fear. Fight or flight is not the usual response for most people. Most people just freeze- something his father said to him and Robb when they were young, explaining some case. 

Tormund broke his silence.  
“Okay, so you have an hour, what do you need? 

Blue, honest eyes met his, and Jon couldn’t stop staring in genuine confusion.

Tormund laughed. 

“Don’t look at me like that. I heard most of what went on, and I realise that you need to be going now to be on time. I assume you need to go home for your material. And shower? You’re drenched in sweat.”

Dumbfounded, Jon nodded. 

“Alright then, you won’t be able to do everything at home, so go shower. I’m gonna organise you a suit to wear, and then I will drive you to the presentation.”

“You’ll drive me?” Jon asked, still speechless at this offer he was being made. 

“Yes, now go; otherwise you’ll be late, we don’t know how the traffic will be” Tormund asserted.

Jon wouldn’t question it. This was his only chance not to be late. The presentation was a whole other thing, but he was prepared, he just had to get to his notes. Which were at home. 

Half an hour later, he was exiting Tormund’s car in Jaime Lannister’s borrowed suit, showered and clean, rushing inside his dorms while Tormund waited in the car. 

Running inside and up the countless flights of stairs, he noticed how much quicker he was compared to when he started and was glad for it. 

Jon burst into their flat, past his flatmates, Gilly, and another person he couldn’t identify, but he didn’t care. 30 minutes to the venue, as Tormund’s navigation system said.  
Now get the notes, he thought, frantically searching through the heap of paper on his desk.

Finally, after what seemed like ages, he found them, grabbed them and ran back out, nearly crashing into the unknown person.  
He heard Edd call after him “Hey Jon, don’t you want to greet Grenn?”

He huffed out a quick, “no time, late for presentation-”

And in a matter of seconds, he was back sprinting towards his trainer’s car. 

Finally, Jon scooted back into his seat, and they were starting in the direction of the venue. 

Catching his breath, he looked over to Tormund, who was- snickering?

“What?” he enquired, somehow, despite his anxiety of being late, started to smile too. Tormund laughing was way to infectious, curse him. 

“It’s just,” His trainer couldn’t stop laughing now, “I have never been able to motivate you to run this fast in training.”

“Oh god,” now Jon was laughing too.

“Seems like you’ve been holding back on me, Stark” Tormund shot him a look. He looked amused, almost even fond.

Jon sputtered, jokingly offended. 

“Relax, boy, I won’t make you suffer more than I already do.” 

Jon watched as Tormund focused back on the road.  
He looked good like this. The streetlights were catching in his ginger hair, making it stand out against the dark muted background. 

Smiling, he opened his notes, focusing on them, while trusting his trainer to get him to the venue. 

20 minutes later, they were pulling in in front of the venue, and Tormund shooed him out of his car.

“Go, do some law! You got this!” he heard Tormund yell after him, while he sprinted towards the building. 

Chaos ensued, but somehow, 5 minutes later, he was stood in front of a rather full lecture room, presenting. He knew that there were some important people in the audience, some from a few pretty big law firms that would be judging them and might offer work experiences to them later. 

His group was doing well, and the presentation was half over, he had done his part. Now he just stood waiting, until of the presentation, maybe there would be some questions.  
His gaze swept over the people in attendance. 

Suddenly, he realised that Tormund did not go back. The ginger man was sat in the audience, back row close to the door, happily watching. He seemed so out of place; Jon almost laughed out loud but caught himself just in time. 

Then, in the same instance, he realised that if Tormund was sitting there, he must have seen him present. Somehow, that made him even more self-conscious than he already was.

He clasped his hands together, in front of him trying to stop his hands fidgeting.  
If you do a lot of things with your hands, it shows that you’re nervous, so keep them still- his father’s voice echoed in his voice. 

He was glad he was wearing a suit, even if it was slightly too big for his frame, it still fit him, and from afar it wasn’t really noticeable. Thank god for Jaime Lannister’s expensive fashion sense. 

Tormund noticed him staring and gave him a thumbs up and a broad smile.  
Jon tried to keep his face neutral even though he just wanted to beam back at him.

How was his trainer even real? He not only let him leave in kind, rather than getting upset at Jon for his lousy time management. This could have gone so much worse. Tormund could have been angry, but instead, he not only offered mental support, he actually found him a suit, and drove him to his dorms and to the venue.  
He was pretty sure that that wasn’t in the contract. Any other trainer would have let him leave and just gone on with their life. And Tormund Giantsbane had not. He even stayed. Offering silent support.

How could he even thank Tormund? Probably by getting his schedule on track, he thought grimly. 

“….and I thank you for your attention!” his group member, Pyp finished the presentation.  
Applause. Davos Seaworth, his mentor, sitting in the front row, clapping enthusiastically, smiling at him kindly.  
Next to him, head of the law department, Stannis Baratheon, who was also clapping with a satisfied look on his face.  
After a couple of questions, they were done, and the next group was getting ready. 

“I’m glad you made it on time, Jon,” Davos clapped his hand on his shoulder.  
“I would have only been able to stall for 10 minutes, I’m glad I didn’t have to!” he continued, smiling at him. 

“I wouldn’t have made it if it weren’t for my trainer” Jon admitted sheepishly. “He kindly drove me here.”

“Let’s not speak of it anymore, go run along now. You did well, I’ll have your grades up sometime this week.” Davos shooed him off with a smile. 

With a scouring look, Jon assessed the room. Due to his father’s promise of a workplace, he wouldn’t have to network like other students might have to. 

Tormund was still there, watching him from his row. Slowly, Jon made his way up to where he was sitting, contemplating how the hell he would thank Tormund. 

Seeing him approach, his trainer broke out into a wide, shit-eating grin.  
It was infectious.  
And then Jon reached Tormund’s row, Tormund pulled him into a half hug, saying something about “You owe me, Stark”, and Jon just knew, this was fine. They were fine.  
Releasing him, Tormund looked down at him, smiling.

“I hope that was worth it, you sounded great,” he said.

“Thanks” Jon’s voice cracked a bit, “I couldn’t have done it without you.”

“Let’s not speak about it.” Tormund laughed, “If you don’t have to stay, how about we go back for that drink with the rest?”

“If you’ll still have me after this stunt I pulled, gladly” Jon replied.

And off they were.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phew, that took a while :D 
> 
> Thank you @Szamanita and Chrissy (a.k.a @thighs-without-mercy on Tumblr) for beta'ing this!
> 
> Enjoy!

The next morning, Jon woke up slowly. Blearily, he opened his eyes, blinking against the sunlight in his eyes. He forgot to close the curtains again. Sitting up, the blankets falling down around him, he tried stretching.

He slept underneath so many sheets, he had to struggle free before he could sit up. He once read that it helped to have a heavy blanket to sleep under when you have anxiety and tried to improvise, so his bed could only be described as a hill of sheets.

He barely had the strength to hold his head up, feeling quite dizzy and tired, arms heavy.  
Sighing heavily, he lied back down.

It was Sunday. The entire stress of yesterday came back to him, and Jon felt like a lorry had run him over.

Tormund had somehow, unquestioningly, once again proved that he was a really good person, helping him out and even driving him to his presentation, which he had fucked up.

Well. Not really fucked up, but nearly. How on earth had he actually forgotten the most important presentation of this semester?

“In times of great stress, the mind will sometimes try to help and lessen the stress by making some memories go away” their family therapist had explained after Bran had developed some retrograde amnesia because of his accident. He supposed it applied here too, or he hoped it was that and not just plain incompetence. Jon didn’t like to feel incompetent.

Nevertheless, he did. He felt useless, even though it was all over and done with.

Tormund had taken him, in his borrowed suit from Lannister, back to the gym where the rest of the trainers had waited for them. Relieved, he had had a few beers, celebrating the “not fuck up” which now, in his mind, was a complete fuck up.

How the hell could he ever do anything again? He was useless, what kind of lawyer forgot a presentation? His group probably hated him, Davos probably thought him to be a complete idiot with no time management.

Feeling ill, he picked up his phone to distract himself and started scrolling through his messages. He hadn’t even looked at his phone since the fateful phone call at training, so there was quite a few to go through.

Ed, (19:32) I hope you make it! Good luck!

Sam, (19:40) Yo, good luck, but Ed is livid,, he just got Grenn to get here for the first time

Gilly, (19:50) forget what sam said, ed is fine, he is just stinky that he didn’t get to gloat and show off Grenn.

Ah, right. Grenn. He recollected Edd shouting something after him, and the strange man in the kitchen. In his haze, he hadn’t really paid attention to anything apart from getting his notes for the presentation.

He felt a bit guilty for keeping on teasing Edd about his crush, but he’d make it right somehow. Maybe let Edd ramble at him for a while, and of course meet Grenn.

Then there were more texts of his group, some mad some not, then some more of Davos.

And then, his trainer.

(19:58) hey, hope you got in fine. I’ve got nothing else to do, so ill cheer you on if that’s ok.  
Good luck! You'll be fine!

(23:37) hey, text me if you got home safe, you were a bit tipsy. Feel guilty I didn’t drive you home.

(07:30) jon, did you get home safe? it says last seen yesterday at 7, please answer me?

Jon sighed, dragging his hand over his face and then covered his eyes. Damn.  
He had slipped out of the gym when it became a bit too much, threw a small ‘thanks’ at Tormund, waved goodbye at the room, and left before anybody could do anything.

Well. Not quite. Jaime (god, they were on first-name basis now, it was so weird) had pulled him in a quick loose hug, and Jon left before there would be more hugs, panicking at the prospect of being around people.

Sometimes, being introverted sucked. One moment, you’re completely fine socialising and being close to people and being surrounded by music, the next, you just wanna be in a corner and away from everybody, and it’s too much.

Yesterday, that exact thing happened, and all he knew was that he had to get out. He supposed he should have maybe waited, and properly said goodbye, at least to Tormund. He apparently lived a while away from the gym, so he didn’t drink because he came with the car that day. Sometimes he took his bike or public transport. Thinking about it, Jon didn’t know if he could have stomached Tormund driving him home then.

Removing his hands from his eyes, he took a steeling breath and started typing.

Jon (10:42) morning, sorry I didn’t reply yesterday, I got home safe  
Not even a minute later, he got a reply, which surprised him. At this time of the day, Tormund was usually at work, and rarely kept his phone on him. He must have been really worried, Jon supposed, which made him feel a bit weird inside.

A strange feeling rose up in his arms, a mixture of both happiness that someone cared, and embarrassment and incomprehension as to why someone would.

Tormund (10:43) oh god im glad, you were gone so quickly, did something happen? You looked really upset

Tormund (10:44) i was so worried

Taking a breath, Jon started typing, now just feeling absolutely awful about it all. Couldn’t he get anything right?

Jon (10:44) I’m sorry, you know when you’re introverted, and you suddenly run out of people-energy? yeah that happened so I just wanted to leave, it had nothing to do with you guys, I actually really enjoyed it im so sorry

Tormund (10:45) oh fuck jon, im sorry, i understand, please dont apologise

Tormund (10:45) next time, pls tell me I want you home safe, I don’t even need to talk to you but id rather you be home safe and then you can relax than have to go all that way by yourself

Jon (10:47) thanks Tormund

Tormund (10:48) no worries, im glad you’re ok

Jon took a deep breath against his nerves. He had never texted so much with Tormund, and the fact that he was really anxious today didn’t help things. Tormund was being way to kind for him to be able to cope. All he wanted to do was thank him over and over again. Biting his lip, he started typing.

Jon (10:53) actually, I really wanted to say thanks again. For helping me yesterday

Jon (10:53) I don’t think a lot of people would have done what you did, especially with you being my trainer

Tormund (10:54) don’t worry about it jon

Tormund (10:55) I got my fun out of it :D shouldn’t have found that so funny, you running like hellhounds were upon you

Jon smiled, despite himself. Tormund just, did that. He was funny and kind, and Jon felt a bit stronger, brave enough to reply a bit more casually.

Jon (10:56) …. I’ll never live that down, will I?

Tormund (10:57) bring outside running shoes tuesday

Jon (10:58) TOrmund no

Tormund (11:00) Tormund yes. Have a good Sunday, got my 11 a clock now

Jon sighed, catching himself full on grinning at his phone despite himself. It seemed like his trainer really did care, his last text confirming he was indeed at work. He didn’t feel like he deserved this.

Pulling his blankets over his head, he willed his dark thoughts to go away.  
He was fine, wasn’t he? He made it, Davos was happy after he came yesterday, so was his group, why the fuck wasn’t he happy? Couldn’t he just, forget the bad things and move on? His throat hurt, and the constricting dull feeling in his chest worsened.

Suddenly, he heard the doorbell ring, and Sam answering it. Thinking it was Gilly, he tuned out the entire thing, trying to focus on his breathing.

Until his door opened.

“Jon?”

Robb. Fuck. He didn’t even live on campus; he must have come the entire way here. Sam was such a traitor sometimes. Perks of having a childhood friend who also knows your overprotective twin brother.

Probably called Robb when Jon didn’t get up at his usual time. Sleeping in was that much of an unusual occurrence that, without a doubt, something was wrong most of the time, and Sam knew that.

Sam was also incredibly bad dealing with emotions. Thus, he usually called Robb, who was incredibly well versed in reading Jon at a glance. And without fail, if he wasn’t at work, would show up to see what was wrong.

“Are you awake?”

He sounded so careful, oh god, Jon was gonna cry. The moment Robb would see his face, he would know that Jon wasn’t doing fine, just like Jon knew with his brother.

The perks of being twins.  
He swallowed hard, willing the tears away that were now streaming down his face. God, what was wrong with him? Everything was literally fine?

“Jon? Sam said you had a thing yesterday and were upset. They didn’t know what was going on, so he called” Robb explained, now seemingly coming closer, Jon heard him take off his jacket and shoes, “I know you’re not asleep Jon, come on, show me your pretty face.”

“Fuck off, Robb” he let out, willing his brother away. Why the fuck did he always have to come when, when-

Robb tugged the blanket of his face.

“Oh, Jon, no- what’s wrong?”

And then he was engulfed in his brother’s arms. More like, Robb was smothering him, and he couldn’t do anything but start sobbing into his brother’s chest, everything left loose.

Robb just had that effect on him, always. His other part, his twin and they hadn’t seen each other in a while, and Jon had missed him.

Everything weighing on him, uni, the fiasco of yesterday, both presentation and the get-together, Davos being mad at him, the deadlines, his fucking crush on his trainer on top of it all. It all came crashing down.

Robb was making soothing noises somewhere above his head while trying to manoeuvre himself around Jon to be more comfortable.

“Ahh, fuck Jon, please, what’s going on, look at me please, Jon, shh it’s okay, I’m here.”

Somehow, Robb managed to force Jon to look at him and make him sit up, forcing him upright, trying to wipe the tears away with his thumbs.

“God, I’ve never been so glad for fuckin Tarly,” he heard Robb swear under his breath as he pulled Jon’s head back into the crook of his neck.

His brother tended to get angry when he saw any of his sibling’s cry. He was the oldest, only by a few minutes, but it was ingrained into him. While they were twins, they weren’t identical, and Jon was always the smaller one. Robb had taken up most of the nutrients, leaving Jon to be much much weaker.

Apparently, as they had learned from their doctor, there was chance that Robb could have absorbed Jon in the womb. From then on, Robb had been terrified and barely able to separate from him, constantly apologising should anything happen to Jon.

He grew out of it, but by the time Sansa could walk, he was back at it again. Overprotective big brother stereotype, in person, he was.

Contrary to everybody’s belief, they could separate though, so when they finished high school, Jon was following his father’s footsteps into being a lawyer.  
In contrast, Robb had followed his dream to become a professional rugby player. And he had entirely succeeded. People called him the “king of the pitch” after he had gotten his team the cup twice.

“That’s it, calm down Jon, it’s fine, I’m here now” Robb soothed as Jon calmed down, hiding his face in his brother’s shirt.

“I h-hate how you always think everything is okay when you’re here” Jon hiccupped slightly, although squeezing his twin a bit closer.

“But that’s how it is! I am your big brother- “

“ - just by a fucking minute-”

“…and if I can’t make it okay, nobody will.”

“…. you sound like Greyjoy.”

“hah- “

“You do!”

“No, I don’t!”

“Do too!”

Robb smoothed down his hair, leaving his hand on Jon’s back, feeling him breathe shakily.

“Right, what’s up?” Robb asked, his brown eyes meeting Jon’s grey ones, “You’re not hurt, are you?”

“No- , “Jon protested.

Too late. Robb expertly started searching him, trying to find any injury, while Jon was desperately trying to fight him off. Soon it turned into a tickling fight, Robb mercilessly finding all of Jon’s spots, and he cursed that his brother was a professional rugby player.

“Fuck you, you do this for a living” he panted, trying to keep Robbs hands off him.

“I will shamelessly abuse that, if it gets you smiling, baby brother.”

Jon scowled at him. Robb laughed, pulling Jon into a hug again.

“Alright then, so you’re not hurt. Now, tell me, why do I have to find my twin crying his eyes out in bed on a Sunday morning?”

Jon grumbled. There was no running away, Robb would find out, he did with everything. Not that that was a bad thing, but if Robb told Mum, or Dad…. That was another thing.  
If they found out he was having anxiety again, there would be interventions, and he really didn’t want to deal with that.

“It’s nothing” he replied, trying to avoid Robb’s eyes.

“Right, and my name is Beyonce.” Sarcasm was evident in Robb’s voice as he wiped his thumb carefully under his eyes.

Jon felt weak. If his head had felt heavy when he woke up, now it weighed a ton more. And his throat hurt too. Letting himself sag against Robb, he lay down, sighing deeply.  
There was no use. Maybe Robb wouldn’t tell, after all, it was nothing. Just a bit of stress, some lousy time management.

Somehow, he forced the words out, telling his twin how he felt, about the stress, and the presentation, and Tormund, the words just flooding out with no stopping.

When he was finished, he was crying again.

“And then he fucking, he fucking texted me if I got home safe, Robb!”

“Really?”

“Yeah, look,” Jon showed his twin the texts.

Robb took Jon’s phone out of his hand, taking a closer look, scrolling upwards.

“Damn.”

Jon exhaled, now feeling a bit better everything was out, but no less dejected.

“Yeah. He’s perfect, Robb, and I can’t even do anything because he’s my fucking trainer.” He said miserably.

Robb put away the phone, now staring at the wall thoughtfully, still drawing little circles on his arm.

“Woah, I didn’t think that in a matter of weeks, so many things could happen.”

“Me neither.”

“You okay now?”

“Does it look like it?”

“…No.”

“…”

Sighing, Robb tousled his hair. They both fell into silence, and Jon focused on his brother’s steady breathing. After a while, Robb interrupted the silence again.

“What do you wanna do? I don’t think you should do anything tonight; you need to rest. You’ve got no more homework, right? How about we just stay in bed for the day?”

“…Okay”

“I brought croissants; you want one?”

“I don’t know, Tormund has me on this insane food plan…”

“I think you deserve it.”

“I’ll relapse.”

“No, you won’t, I’ll be here the entire day, I’ll take watch.”

“You will what?”

“Yeah, imma stay, Jon, you’re my baby brother, I’ve got nothing else to do, and you need some rest, and I bet the moment I’ll leave you’ll cry again, and I am gonna make it better.”

“….okay.”

“Croissant?”

“… don’t feel like eating.”

“… Jon.”

“Robb,” Jon replied petulantly.

“Jon, you gotta eat something, even if it’s not croissants, I don’t mind!”

“.....can you make oatmeal? Like when we were kids?” Jon asked shyly, suddenly feeling very stupid. His brother had brought croissants, what was up with him?

But he didn’t want to disappoint Tormund further. Having oats, those exact ones Robb had always made when they were young, when they both helped Mum get all of their siblings ready, would maybe make him feel better. Jon missed it. He didn't feel like croissants anyway, just thinking about the texture made him feel bad.

Robb apparently didn’t care though, not even pulling a face at his request. He looked rather relieved though, although Jon didn’t really understand.

“Yeah, with apples?”

“Please?”

“Anything for you Jon,” Robb got up from the bed, but not before mussing his hair, making Jon groan at him in annoyance. He left his room, closing the door behind him, and Jon started hearing him putter about in the kitchen.

Soon, he heard Sam and Robb murmuring, probably about him.

He sighed deeply. God. That got out of hand quickly.

He had always been prone to anxiety, especially after Bran’s accident. Mum and Dad, especially Dad, were so worried, one kid freshly disabled, the other one moving from one anxiety attack to the next- It had somehow subsided, when Bran had gotten better, only to return when Robb and him finished high school. But that had faded again, and yet-  
Now, he was pretty sure it was returning, uni stress causing him to spiral. Great. Just what he needed.

A few minutes later, Robb came back in, bowl in hand, and something that looked very much like tea.

They settled back against the headboard, Robb carefully handing him his food. The smell was divine, and Jon noticed that he actually was hungry, and tucked in, watching his twin brother thoughtfully start eating his croissant. Robb hummed, fixing his gaze on him, watching him scrutinizingly.

“So, you have a crush on your trainer. Your personal trainer. And you can’t pursue him because you signed a no-relationships-at-work clause in your contract.” Robb contemplated, no doubt thinking through the possibilities, just like Jon had. He was still a lawyer’s son, even if he took a different path.

“Yup.” Jon popped the p.

"But it's only forbidden if he is your personal trainer?"

"What are you suggesting?" Jon asked curiously.

"I'm suggesting nothing! Just, like, don’t lose hope? I mean, how long can such a thing take? At most just a few months, right? So, after, you could still try asking him out.” Robb said.

“Yeah, but will I survive? If he continues being so kind and shit, I will literally implode I think-“Jon said theatrically, then shoved Robb as his twin rolled his eyes at him.

“Legitimately, I am not worried about that, I’m more worried about you falling back into Anxiety, I don’t want that to happen,” Robb admitted, “I know this entire Tormund situation stresses you out too, but I think if you really want to make this happen, you’ll find a way.”

“I don’t know.”

“You’ll be fine, Jon. Just make your puppy eyes at him and he will cave.” Robb teased.

“Fuck off, you know that doesn’t work.”

“It will, you already got him worried over you! The man literally asked if you got home safe! He didn’t even have to do that.”

“He’s just being kind!”

“Jon-“

“Nothing will come off it, Robb! He’s my trainer!”

“Alright then, be like that, but promise me one thing. If you’re still pining after the man when you’re done, you’re asking him out. Deal?”

“I’m not pining-“

“Yes, you are. Deal?”

“Alright. Fuck you.”

“So kind to me, little brother, such loving words! I’m helping you!” Robb said melodramatically, making Jon laugh.

They dropped into silence. Jon finishing his oatmeal, Robb starting his second croissant.

“Do you wanna watch Scrubs?” Robb suggested after a while, it was their favourite series when they were growing up.

“All right, but only if you let me choose the episode,” Jon nodded.

“Sure thing,” Robb accepted it quickly, rising to get Jon’s laptop so they could watch on the bed together.  
They spent the rest of the day like that, cuddling in bed, watching scrubs. A few times, Robb left to get them some food, not questioning Jon’s food choices again, letting him continue with his food plan.  
It was well past 6 pm when Robb felt that Jon was better. He didn’t, however, leave before extracting a promise that Jon would call him if it got bad again, knowing that midterms would come up soon.

Tired, Jon hugged Robb tightly and watched him leave his flat, waving goodbye while his twin jogged down the stairs.

What a day. Hopefully, his anxiety wouldn’t get worse. While he did feel quite a bit better when Robb was there, he wasn’t so sure he would actually improve. Midterms were approaching way too fast and Jon dreaded the outcome. Hopefully tomorrow he’d be better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope the next chapter will be quicker!
> 
> Leave a comment or smash that ♥!


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, my updates are getting quicker :D hopefully i'll keep it up! 
> 
> Thanks @Szamanita for the beta!

It's Monday. An off day for him, but he's there anyways. After spending the entire day off yesterday in, cuddling with Robb, he'd come to the conclusion that he should probably work off some of the stress today. With Tormund not there to correct his every pose, it could be just him, blowing off some steam.

He changed into his gym clothes in the locker rooms, throwing a quick look into the mirror. He looked good, despite himself. Having cried the majority of yesterday, his eyes did look a bit red still. He could also do with a haircut, he thought, his dark curls have gotten to shoulder length now. With a sigh, Jon tied it into a loose, messy bun on top of his head.

He musters himself, a few weeks of training have started to show on his body. His arms look way more defined, and his tummy is way firmer than it had been. Generally, he feels a lot better in his body if he disregards the state of his mind for a moment.

Today, he just wants to do a bit of cardio, treadmills and stuff, to blow off some steam. On the periphery of his mind, he's aware that on Tuesday, Tormund will have him outside running, but he doesn't care if he'll work up a muscle ache today. This is for his mental health. Tormund will deal if he's tired tomorrow.

Resolved, he grabs his bottle of water, securing his stuff into one of the lockers. The treadmills are on the second floor of the gym. Climbing the stairs, he lets his gaze wander the room. From afar, he sees Jaime Lannister drilling someone new, a tall thin man with dark curly hair and a sneer on his face. He looks determined at least, and Jaime seems to be very exasperated, Jon recognises.

Jon disregards them, settling down on a bench next to the treadmills, retying his shoes and putting on some music to run too. Setting the treadmill to a pace that suits him, he starts jogging.

His mind starts running circles, and he is just barely aware of people moving around in the gym.

Thinking about the presentation, Jon tries hard to not fall into self-loathing again but just strategically analysing what else he needs to do for that subject. The last thing he wants to happen is for him to fuck shit up again.

Midterms are approaching fast, and he knows it will be hard. It was hard last semester, but somehow his second semester proved to be much worse. He doesn't know why. The presentation fiasco unsettled him. 

Now his mind is spewing things which he _knows_ are just a fuckload of intrusive, awful depressed thoughts, but he can't help it. Maybe throwing himself into work is not exactly the best type, but kill fire with fire, right?

Either his plan would work, and throwing himself into working hard for his midterms would make his anxiety less because he was doing things. Or it could make things a lot more stressful. And yet, if he didn't, he would feel so much worse because he didn't do anything.

The last thing he had ever wanted was to disappoint his dad, he needed good grades.

A small voice in his head whispers treacherously, "You know that dad won't care if you take a time out, he loves you", but he doesn’t listen. 

Thoughts wandering, he keeps jogging, distantly noting that a few weeks ago, he couldn't even hold this pace for 5 minutes. A quick glance at the clock tells him it had been 20 already, so just 10 left until he'd go for some lifting. Someone joins him on the treadmills, immediately next to him. He ignores it in favour of staring out of the windows, listening to music.

The treadmills are situated in front of the large windows, overlooking the busy street outside. Suddenly, there’s a flash of red.

Is that?

Sure enough, that’s Tormund, climbing off a fucking Motorcycle. Wasn't it enough, him being a personal trainer, nearly bodybuilder type? No. Apparently not. He had to be a biker too.

His long, ginger curls fall down his shoulders, messily, as Tormund stows away his helmet. God, the leatherware on this man. His trainer is dressed in full protective gear, and that jacket just made his arm muscles stand out a lot more than usual. 

Then, in rapid succession, he notices a few things. 

One, his trainer was looking absolutely and undeniably hot in full, skintight gear. 

Two, he was gaping, mouth open. 

Three. He was starting to feel himself get hard.

Jon watches as the man-makes his way inside, suddenly realising that Tormund might notice him when he was done changing.

Suddenly scared, he wonders if it is a problem, him coming in on off days, but remembers Tormund explaining something about coming in whenever.

Then, he realises that Tormund might notice his boner, or not even just him, the rest of the people too. That would be incredibly inconvenient.

Desperately, he tries to start thinking of the most unsexy things he'd ever experienced. Just as he manages to get it down, he notices the doors of the changing rooms open again, and there he is. 

Trying not to be too obvious in looking down, because he literally has to crane his neck to see him, he musters his trainer. Same blue shirt, shorts, and his ginger curls in a bun now. 

Out of the corner of his eye, he notices a movement. He glances to the person on the treadmill next to him that had joined him earlier but paid no attention too.

And does a double-take, as Robb looks at him with a shit-eating grin. 

Ripping out his earbuds, he wants to hiss at him, what he is doing here, what is he thinking- but his twin interrupts.

"So, that's him, then? I gotta admit, he does look good in leather."

It dawns on him that Robb must have witnessed- he is sure he is blushing furiously now. 

"Robb, what the fuck-" he manages, hissing, desperately trying to reign in the rising heat in his cheeks. 

"Aww, is someone embarrassed? God Jon, if you react like this all the time, it's super obvious you have a crush on the man." his brother teases. 

"No-, it's not, I don't, I'm not like this usually, oh fuck off, Robb!" he tries to defend himself, but Robb falls into laughter. How he still manages to look fucking, flawless on that treadmill, not even once stumbling, keeping his pace, is beyond him. 

"I know, baby bro, I'm just teasing. I'm sure you're the image of self-containment." 

"Oh fuck off."

Jon's alarm rings and his 30 minutes cardio are up, so he gets down. Wiping his face with his towel, he groans, as he notices Robb get off too. 

"What the fuck are you even doing here, this is not your usual Gym?" he asks, already dreading the answer. 

"Well, I had the day off, and you know I got this fancy-schmancy gym membership thing where I can go to every gym in the city, right? Perks of being professional. So I thought I might give your gym a visit, to see this Tormund guy, who has my brother wrapped around his fingers." he explains. 

Jon sighs. Of course. Robb notices a new thing and immediately goes into a protective big brother mode. 

"I didn't think I would see you here today though, I just wanted to see him for myself, whats up Jon?"

"I just, after yesterday, I thought it might be good to blow off some of the stress with some light cardio." Robb sighs and moves in closer, moving a strand of hair that's stuck to the side of his face with sweat.

"That might actually be a good idea. I'm sorry if I've thrown you off, I just couldn't resist, and you also didn't notice me, and then the dude arrived so."

Robb actually looks guilty, and once again, Jon is overcome with affection for his twin. He really just cares. 

"It's fine, I know you just want to protect me," he replies, smiling at his brother.

"Right then, wanna do a few exercises with me then? Get to know how a professional trains?"

His twin looks gleeful now, at the prospect of training with him. Like the old days, in school, but then they weren't at a gym. 

He sighs, nodding. Robb won't leave anyway, so why not?

They go through a few exercises, and Jon actually manages to have fun and laugh alongside his brother. A few teasing remarks still come through, but soon they are both focused on the drills, falling into a comfortable silence. 

He missed this. At school, they used to play rugby together, so they were always inseparable, and university made this experience very rare.

Jon notices he doesn't feel nearly as bad as he did when he began here today. 

Somehow, now he is really glad Robb is here, everything falls away, and he just focuses on his twin, like it used to be. This is comfortable, this feels right, joking with Robb and not thinking about anything stressful. They get to stretches after their done, carefully warming down after the workout. Jon feels good, not too exhausted. 

It's been an hour, and suddenly Jon realises that the moment he realised Robb was here, he stopped paying attention to Tormund. 

As he swivels around in a pose, still stretching, he lets his gaze wander across the room in search of his trainer, and being rewarded. 

His eyes find Tormunds, who is watching him? Looking away quickly when Jon meets his eyes as if he was caught staring. Hm, weird. 

Robb, of course, notices immediately, they don't even need words sometimes. They exchange a view, and Robb raises his eyebrow. 

"He was looking at your ass."

"He was not." Jon denies. But was he? He can't be sure. 

Throwing one look back, he sees Tormund has turned back to instructing his client for the day as if nothing happened. But their eyes did cross. 

"He was" Robb emphasises and god. Jon knows by the exact tone of his voice when he's lying, like the little nuances, but he doesn't hear them now, so he isn't lying. 

"He wasn't", Jon huffs, getting back to stretching. He was looking somewhere else, surely.

"Alright," Robb relents.

"Help me stretch, asshole" Jon mutters, and Robb does. 

Five minutes later, Robb leaves first to change, while Jon gets his bottle back from the treadmills where he forgot it. By the time he climbs down the stairs, his twin has already vanished into the changing rooms. 

"Jon! Hey!"

A voice comes from somewhere behind him, and there is Tormund, in all his glory.

Suddenly, everything comes rushing back. The presentation fiasco, the car drive, the get-together, him leaving early-

"Hi," he replies, willing his embarrassment away, and looking to the floor, trying to look anywhere but his trainer. God, he is so embarrassing.

"What you doing here today, it's your off day? Am I not pushing you hard enough?" 

And oh, he sounds so unsure and questioning, and fuck, he made a mess out of this again. 

"No no no, Tormund, it's not that, you're doing awesome!" he reassures his trainer, looking up at him.

"I just, had a bit of a bad day yesterday and thought it might be good to try to do a workout to get the stress to go away."

"Ah, I'm glad to hear that, doing sports is a great stress relief," Tormund sounds concerned, but continues, “I hope you're okay now, though? I was really worried to see you vanish so quickly on Saturday,"

They are standing a bit closer now, and his trainer has a reassuring hand on his arm. It makes him feel really, really warm inside, and he tries not to blush. Jon just can't get accustomed to people he has crushes on touching him. He's always been like that. 

"Yeah, I'm doing a bit better," Jon evades the question, he really does not want Tormund to know he spent an entire day crying in bed.

"Being with Robb helped a lot", he finishes, and Tormund removes his hand from his shoulder, so he can breathe again.

"Robb? That the guy you were with? He looks like the dude playing for the 'Wolves', didn't he win them the cup twice?"

Jon can't identify the look on Tormund's face now, he seems somewhat, tenser now? 

"Yeah, that's him. You probably don't see him around much; usually, he's somewhere else, but he's got this special card for professionals, so he decided to accompany me."

"Yeah, I heard of that." 

Jon hears the door behind him open, and by the gait, that's Robb, so he turns around. He has changed into his casual clothes, his bag casually hanging off his shoulder. He has this really, really smug look on his face, and Jon dreads what his twin might get up to. He really doesn't want Robb to make things awkward. 

"You ready, Jonny-boy? Shall I drive you home?"

Robb is beside him now, throwing an arm around his shoulder. 

Jon sighs. He still has to change, but now he really really does not want to leave his twin alone with his trainer. 

"Sure, but wanna meet my trainer? Robb, this is Tormund, Tormund, this is my idiot twin-brother, Robb."

"Pleased to meet you," Tormund says, and again, that weird look is on his face, relief and something else Jon can't place. Why would he be relieved, though?

They shake hands, and Robb _musters_ Tormund, Jon wants to kick him in the shins but settles for a pinch in his back where his trainer can't see. If it hurts him, Robb doesn't show it. 

"Twins, huh?", the ginger asks then, and Jon can see his eyes flickering between them both, trying to find a connection. 

"Yeah," Jon nods. 

"Not identical though, you don't look like you are." 

"No, we're not. Jon was always smaller, I nearly absorbed him in the womb, but alas. Here he is, still small, but also ferocious." Robb teases, and now Jon really cuffs him. 

"I'm not that small, Robb, fuck off." Jon scowls, trying to get away from under Robbs arm, but he holds tightly, so Jon is just flailing weirdly. 

"Mature, little brother, mature," Robb teases. 

Tormund laughs, and Jon's belly does a weird flip. It's the deep belly laugh, a loud, thundering sound, and he immediately has to smile as well.

He's in so deep, fuck. 

"So I gather you're the younger one, Jon?" Tormund enquires after he has stopped laughing.

"Yes, and Robb never lets me live it down." 

"Aye, never, it's too easy to tease him with that." Robb laughs, and then tightens his hand on his shoulder, turning to him. 

"Right, are you gonna get changed? I drove here, so I can drive you home," he says, and Jon knows that he can't put this off any longer. At least now Robb can't pretend he is his lover or something to get a reaction out of his trainer. 

"Sure, gimme a sec," he says, and then smiles up at Tormund, before leaving for the stalls. He really does hope Robb doesn't do anything weird now. 

Changing in record time, not even a couple of minutes, he wipes his face with a towel and throws a look into the mirror, fixing his bun. 

He looks good, a bit exhausted maybe, but luckily there isn’t anything in his face. That would be embarrassing. 

When he finally leaves the changing rooms, Tormund and Robb are still there, talking. 

"...We used to play rugby together in high school! We were basically inseparable until uni, but I decided to go professional rather than follow dad to become a lawyer as Jon did."

"And now I'm left with a twin that is basically famous, and I'm just a poor law student," Jon butts into the conversation, casually stopping next to them again. 

At that, the three of them burst into laughter. 

“ ‘You done?” Robb turns to Jon, and he nods. 

“Thanks, Tormund, I’ll see you tomorrow!” Jon looks up at Tormund, shouldering his bag. 

“Yeah, don’t forget to bring your outside shoes, I’m taking you running to the park tomorrow!” comes the reply, and Jon can’t help but beam up at him. 

“Sure thing” 

And they’re off. With a last smile and a quick “Bye!” thrown at Jaime, who is just coming down from upstairs now, they walk out of the gym. 

Robb walks him to his car, holding the door open for him, in silence until they sit down, Jon sliding into the seat next to Robb, who’s driving.

“You’re whipped.” 

“I know.”

“I can see why though, he seems really nice. I thanked him for driving you to the presentation, he seems absolutely genuine.” 

“Robb! What else did you tell him about me?” 

“Nothing, nothing!” Robb laughs, “Just that and then we talked about being twins because he asked why you don’t play rugby with me, professionally, if we’re so close”

“Hm.” Jon hums. 

Robb starts the car, and Jon puts on the radio. And immediately turns it off again, because it starts blasting Taylor Swift at the highest volume ever. 

“Oh my god, Robb. I am so disappointed in you” Jon says, half-serious, half-joking.

“Oh fuck off, just because you’re listening to that emo shit all the time or just straight-up gay music.” Robb splutters, trying to defend himself. 

“It’s not emo music!!!!!!” 

“It is!”

“...okay. It is a bit. But, Taylor Swift? Really?” 

“What can I say? Her songs are catchy.” 

They fall into a comfortable silence, and Jon leans back in his seat, watching the traffic.

He is glad that he came today that Robb joined him, even though he wanted to die of embarrassment. 

Tomorrow he’ll see Tormund again, and he can’t wait. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave a comment! They water my crops and give me life!


	8. Chapter 8: Tormund

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I sat my ass down and finally wrote this chapter! Thank you to @Szamanita for beta'ing me! 
> 
> This chapter is from Tormund's POV, so it was a bit of a challenge for me to write! Let me know what you think!

The wind is howling as he drives the familiar route to the gym. He rarely ever takes his bike there, as the roads aren't always safe for using his motorcycle. But now, it's the season again, and he relishes in the feeling.

He put on his safety gear that morning, taking a chance with his safety was never on his agenda, so he's equipped in the safest shit he owned. The leathers are tight around his body, looks like he's gained some muscle since he last donned them.

His sister laughs at him as he makes his way inside, a bright, happy sound, and he's glad they work at the same place. She is, after all, his favourite little sister. Not that he has any more than her. And even one sibling is enough, she could be a handful sometimes.

But they were quite close always and had become even closer once she had shed the last of her puberty. Ygritte's 20 now, just about six years younger than him.

"Look at you, Tormund! I swear those leathers make you look like some video game character, you know. Or a superhero, with those muscles!"

They laugh together, and Tormund leans over the reception desk to ruffle her hair.  
His sister ducks just in time to avoid his hand and slaps at it.

"Go change, you big oaf. Your 2 pm is nearly here!" Ygritte exclaims, but the sly smile on her face makes him pause.

"Why are you grinning like that, you loon?" he braces himself on the reception, elbows firmly on the table. He is fixing Ygritte with his "I'm your big brother, you better not be talking shit" glance, but can't stop the grin on his face.

"We've got visitors. First, that dude from the 'Wolves' showed up, you know the one that won them the cup twice? I know rugby isn't your thing, but you must have seen him. He's a real looker," Ygritte leans in conspiratorially.

"Ah, you know I don't really care for that," Tormund scoffs, already turning away disinterestedly, but Ygritte catches his hand.

"Your lover-boy is here, off-schedule," Ygritte says smugly, quiet enough, so the videos don't pick it up, grinning up at him with glee.

"Ygritte," he hisses, "stop calling him that someone might hear-"

"So, you're not denying it?"

"Oh my god- shut up, he's not my lover boy, I don't even know what you're on about."

"Ah, so you staring at him, quite thirstily, does not imply you have a crush on him? Merrily, appreciating, the muscles? Come on big brother, he's a cutie!"

"He's also my trainee, and thus very much off-limits."

"Hmm. Keep denying it that vehemently, and I might think something's up! He is gay, you know," Ygritte says conversationally, and he hates how she manages to press his buttons all the time.

"I know, he said it at the bike session with Val." He retorts distractedly.

His mind already running at a hundred miles, but he picks up his bag again and walks to the changing rooms, Ygritte no doubt staring at him with a smug look on her face.

Why is Jon here? He left so early on Saturday, sounded so agitated. He did say it was a thing about introversion, but what if he fucked something up?

He doesn't think he did, but his mind got the better of him. He just wants Jon to like him-  
Fuck. Maybe he really does have a crush on him.

Absentmindedly, he peels the layers and layers of protective motorcycle gear off him and starts dressing in his uniform.

Jon Stark. It's been a few months since he had first laid his eyes on him. A law student, second semester, 20 years old, curly dark brown hair and grey eyes like a sky full of clouds-

Now that sounds sappy.

His trainee was one of the best he had recently, responding well to his methods, although lately, Jon had seemed a bit stressed. To top it all off, he had nearly missed a presentation were it not for Tormund's quick thinking. He hadn't thought twice, a plan developing in his mind as he overheard Jon's supervisor yelling at him through the phone. It was not necessarily part of his responsibilities, but alas. He would have been done after Jon anyways.

Sighing, he secures his gear in his personal locker and leaves the changing rooms.

Jon Stark might be the most handsome client he's ever had, his type, and also gay-

But he's still his personal trainer. He wouldn't be able to do anything until Jon would cancel the agreement, and somehow, he didn't want that either, because he liked having the brunette at the gym. Tormund enjoyed training with Jon much more than he should.

He steps out, eyes scanning the room, the ground floor full of people. His 2pm is still changing, as Ygritte signals him through the glass door connecting the lobby to the gym.

Letting his eyes wander, he tries finding Jon- the little voice inside him, sounding remarkably like Ygritte going "Oh, still looking for him? Fooling ourselves, aren't we, saying you don't have a crush on the man."

There- Jon's on the treadmills, seemingly talking to the man next to him. A small bell rings his mind, that's the fucking rugby dude that Ygritte spoke about. He doesn't know his name. He looks familiar, though, and quite handsome. They seem pretty familiar with each other, seemingly squabbling.

His gaze is ripped away as his 2pm arrives, and they make for the machines. Even though he's supposed to work, he catches himself looking at the pair on the second floor.

Every time he watches, he is struck by their familiarity. Jon did say he was gay. Maybe that was his boyfriend? He had never said anything, but he couldn't blame him. The rugby dude was built. They were doing some exercises together, and Tormund feels surprised at the feeling of envy catching in his gut.

Envy? Is he really jealous about his client doing some extra work, with someone else? Fucking hell Giantsbane, get your shit together.

For the next while, he focuses on Jeyne, she's been his client for a while. By the time he looks back, Jon and the rugby dude are stretching, and-

Jon does the little stretch he's shown him, back in the first training when Jon had complained about sore calves. He had never seen him do it from this angle, though.

One thing he had immediately noticed, the first day during measurements, Jon Stark wouldn't need so much work on his backside. Lewd thoughts be damned, the man had an ass on him.

Jon turned, and their eyes met, and Tormund quickly averts his view.

Shit. Had he noticed him? Why the fuck was he staring at his client's ass. Giantsbane, get your shit together oh my god. Maybe Ygritte was right. Oh fuck, she was definitely right.

He was absolutely done for that boy. Fucking smitten with those eyes from the very first day, and while he had not been necessarily flirting- asking after the man's sexuality? Jesus Christ. That was his client. Fuck.

And then he had brought him to that presentation, and boy was Jon capable of delivering. That presentation had been bomb, Jon's voice steady despite the drama, no trace of insecurity, describing their case in exact and precise manner.

The hug, as thanks after, was only fuelling him, so he had invited him to relax after. The tension in Jon's body had been gone for a while, and then suddenly he was running, barely managing a goodbye. Tormund should have driven him home. And then he didn't reply, until late morning.

Why the fuck did he care so much for this man already?

He finishes up with Jeyne, they'd had a short session today only half an hour, but she always stays longer unsupervised.

He sees Jon make his way down, no trace of the other guy.

"Jon! Hey!" he hears himself call out before he knows it. Fuck it. He needs to know why he's here, he really doesn't want to be the one that fucked shit up, why Jon feels the need to come in on off days.

"Hi," Jon replies, coming to a stop in front of him, although looking at the floor.

Tormund decides to go for a joking tone.

"What you doing here today, it's your off day? Am I not pushing you hard enough?" he smiles, but fuck it, he can't keep the insecurity out of his voice, but damn he is worried. What if Jon doesn't like him? Maybe he went too far?

"No no no, Tormund, it's not that, you're doing awesome! I just, had a bit of a bad day yesterday and thought it might be good to try to do a workout to get the stress to go away," Jon starts rambling at him.

Tormund now notes the slightly red eyes, the slump of his shoulders.

"Ah, I'm glad to hear that, doing sports is a great stress relief," Tormund tries to keep the concern out of his voice.

(don't overstep, don't fucking overstep now) and (shit, he's got anxiety).

Jon hums in response. Torn between stepping close and wrapping him in a hug and trying not to overstep, Tormund settles with putting a hand on his client's shoulder, trying to reassure.

"I hope you're okay now, though? I was really worried to see you vanish so quickly on Saturday," he adds, searching the younger man's face.

"Yeah, I'm doing a bit better, being with Robb helped a lot" comes the reply, and a small smile is playing on Jon's lips.

Ah. So, they were quite close. Boyfriends, most likely. Fuck. He tries to school his features into something normal looking, instead of a disappointed grimace. You're his trainer, you shouldn't have a crush on him anyways, Giantsbane. Fuck. And now he's admitted to himself he has a fucking crush. He needs to ask anyways.

"Robb? That the guy you were with? He looks like the dude playing for the 'Wolves', didn't he win them the cup twice?" he asks, a bit tensely, trying hard to seem unaffected.

"Yeah, that's him. You probably don't see him around much; usually, he's somewhere else, but he's got this special card for professionals, so he decided to accompany me."

"Yeah, I heard of that."

Before he can think of anything else, Jon turns around and there he is. Robb, the rugby dude, in casual, with what can only be described a smirk.

"You ready, Jonny-boy? Shall I drive you home?" the rugby guy throws a hand around Jon's shoulder, and Tormund's heart aches a bit. Why are the good ones always taken? Not that he would have had a chance anyway, he's his bloody trainer. It must be showing on his face.

But then Jon replies and-

"Sure, but wanna meet my trainer? Robb, this is Tormund, Tormund, this is my idiot twin-brother, Robb."

That's his brother. His twin brother. Oh my god. The heavy feeling in his gut dissipates, and why the fuck does he feel so relieved at that? Be rational, Tormund, you're his fucking trainer, stop this, be normal-

"Pleased to meet you," he manages and shakes Robb's hand.

He can see the connection now, although just barely. Robb is a lot more defined where Jon's features are soft.

Eyebrows, nose and eyes have the same shape, but their lips are different (Jon's are much fuller, the traitorous voice in his head whispers)

"Twins, huh?" he smiles at Jon, trying to not look too giddy.

"Yeah,"

"Not identical though, you don't look like you are."

"No, we're not. Jon was always smaller, I nearly absorbed him in the womb, but alas. Here he is, still small, but also ferocious." Robb replies, and Tormund has to laugh, as Jon tries to both hit and get away from his brother at the same time.

"I'm not that small, Robb, fuck off."

"Mature, little brother, mature,"

Tormund bursts into laughter. This is peak sibling activity, and he recognises it from himself and Ygritte. He wonders why he didn't notice it sooner, suddenly replaying all of the interactions he had seen earlier.

They talk a bit more until Jon goes to get changed, and the smile he throws him as he leaves makes his heart stutter a bit.

He's your client, stop it, it's not allowed-

'You can look, that's not illegal' the voice in his head replies.

He small talks with Robb, questioning about the rugby thing and congratulating him. Robb responds in kind, offering up some details about their childhood.

"...We used to play rugby together in high school! We were basically inseparable until uni, but I decided to go professional rather than follow dad to become a lawyer as Jon did," the man explains with much fervour as he sees Jon come out of the changing rooms.

"And now I'm left with a twin that is basically famous, and I'm just a poor law student," Jon easily re-joins the conversation, stopping next to them.

Tormund can't help but laugh, a bit incredulous at Jon. He must really have some problems with anxiety. He was doing really well at the presentation; he can barely believe Jon's self-deprecation.

Before he knows it, Jon and Robb are saying goodbye, and Tormund is glad that he's gonna see Jon tomorrow as well. And not even in a formal setting. Running in a park is something else entirely, away from the masses in the gym.

He's too gleeful for that.

"Yeah, don't forget to bring your outside shoes, I'm taking you running to the park tomorrow!" he reminds Jon, and the smile he gets back- No. He's your client. Stop.

"Sure thing," Jon says, and with a quick bye at Jaime who is coming down the stairs, they're gone.

"So, what is the "Wolves" quarterback doing here? With our resident baby-lawyer?" Jaime leans on the wall next to him, where Tormund is still watching after the two brothers.

"They're twins." He retorts, chancing a quick glance at Jaime.

He looks shocked so much so that Tormund has to laugh at him.

"Wow," Jaime utters under his breath.

"Yep."

Tormund's still a bit awestruck himself.

"I would have never thought that, looking at them. They look very close, but then again, they're twins."

"Yeah, same."

"Huh. Well then, maybe we can get some discount tickets" the blonde continues nonchalantly, and Tormund swats him over the back of his neck.

"We will not, that's wildly inappropriate, now back to work, Lannister!"

Jaime laughs good-naturedly, and they go back to work, teasing each other some more.

If Tormund is a bit more distracted, neither he nor his colleague comment on it.

Tomorrow, he will meet Jon again, this time free from the constraints of the gym, and he keeps catching himself smiling at the thought.

Damn, the boy has him whipped. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave a comment, I'd love to hear your thoughts on this chapter!


	9. Chapter 9 : Jon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much @Louhetar for putting up with my bullshit and also beta'ing me. I'd be lost without you honestly !!!

It’s about precisely one week later after Robb had accompanied him to the gym. And now, Jon is absolutely gasping for a break. 

On Tuesday, everything was still fine, and he had met Tormund in the park. The weather was great, it was relatively warm out and the sun was shining. Despite the nice weather, his trainer had still relentlessly drilled him, but it was a lot more fun than training inside, in the gym. 

There was still professionalism all around, but they joked around a bit more and talked a lot when Jon wasn't panting.

Actually, he did get a lot stronger in the weeks that he'd been training, and Tormund's been showing him his progress. The pictures and measurements were the best, he lost some centimetres where he wanted them but gained some as well. His arms gained the most muscles, he was the happiest about them. Right now, he's about halfway through to his goal, maybe even a bit further along. 

The older man didn't leave him time to relax, though. 

By the time they had finished the lap around the park and were stretching, Jon was wrecked. 

They had walked back to the gym, and it was the first time they had spoken without any sort of barriers. Jon found out that Tormund loved playing video games in his free time (they had that in common), and cooked a lot. That made a lot of sense since it was he who sent Jon his meal plans, complete with recipe ideas. Thinking about the redhead in the kitchen, humming while cooking, with an apron-

Jon had to suppress the wish to _see_ it. Not only that, but Tormund seemed so interesting to him, he just wanted to know more. Gaming with him, or chilling together sounded so very appealing, but no. That man was still his trainer. 

(‘But you did get on so _splendidly’_ , Jon tried to bury the voice whispering into his ear.) 

Now, a full week later, he's buried in work up to his neck. Midterms have arrived, and he's studying hard. He's missed last Saturdays' training, having texted Tormund that he'd have to tap out when it became apparent that for his exam on Tuesday, he might have to pull some all-nighters. 

He also full-on cancelled the Tuesday lesson, as the exam was scheduled directly around that time. 

The exam that he just left. He feels numb, handing in that paper to the examiner. He's so unsure what to feel, he's prepared the case and answered all questions, but what if he missed something? That would be really bad. 

He tries to swallow all of the emotions down. There's no _time_ to have a moment right now, he needs to get back into the library to revise. Or write his essay? Which one though, there are a couple he still has to write.

But first, coffee. 

Jon queues at one of the universities cafés, lost in his mind. He's in a bit of a daze, barely noting acquaintances greeting him as he finally moves to the library. 

He starts working on one of his essays, on company law. His most hated topic. And yet, he settles down in front of his laptop, starting to type. 

When he looks back up from his computer, it's dark out. His stomach grumbles, but he's not done yet. If he goes home now, he'll just sink down on his bed and do nothing. He knows himself. Productivity suicide, that is.

He stays. 

The library is open 24/7 since it's midterms. 

He gets a snack from one of the vending machines and another coffee. 

It's 1 am, and he's barely finished, but he has to get home. 

Lectures start early tomorrow. 

Maybe he'll get in a couple of hours. 

*

Before he knows it, it's 8 am on Wednesday, and the entire thing starts again. 

*

And again on Thursday. 

*

He misses his class with Tormund, barely managing to text him 5 minutes before, which gets him a really concerned:

"Don't worry about it, Jon! Please take care of yourself!" 

*

On Friday, there is solely one thing that gets him a break, which still isn't a real break but it does make him smile. It's Professor Seaworth, who’s just recently offered to drop the “Sir” to him. His supervisor shows up to the social fundraiser Jon also has to be at (he’d much rather revise but he _has_ to be here), as the plus one of Dr. Stannis Baratheon, the head of the law department at his university. 

They're not really overly obvious about it, but it's so cute. Jon knows it's been coming for a while, spending some time in Davos' office and watching Dr. Baratheon collect his supervisor for lunch. Davos always blushes, just a bit, but Jon sees it anyways.

And yet, it doesn't give him a real break. 

*

Tormund has taken to texting him now, and it's kind of a godsend when his phone pings on Thursday morning, now two weeks after the park session. 

He's missed training for two weeks now, and today he's planning to go back. His midterms are sort of over, but not really. Just the pile-up of exams in the first two weeks, with the usual amount of essays and group-works to get done, is over. 

The man had made it his mission to get him to eat properly when after he checked in on last Saturday, Jon had replied honestly. 

His trainer had become concerned at Jon's reply. 

Jon, _17:34_ : "If i'm gonna be honest, I haven't had anything but 4 coffees and a sandwich today" 

Tormund, 18:13: _"Jon._ Your exams and essays can wait, go eat something. It will do you nothing good if you don't have the energy to fuel that smart brain of yours. Eat something easy and small. I'm gonna revise your food plan to make quicker, easier meals so you can actually eat." 

Jon had tried to adhere to the new plan, and it had worked, somehow. Not that it helped him with his mental health much, he still had anxiety, but it kind of did help in some other aspects. It made his day easier because he had more energy to actually pull those all-nighters. He was still exhausted, not as much as before though. 

*

And now, standing in front of the door of "Freefolk Fitness", he's wondering if he'll even be able to make it through the workout. He’s slept a bit better, but he’s still tired. 

Like on autopilot, he moves on, inside. His body is so spent, but he doesn't wanna fail more. He's been missing two weeks, and for some reason it makes him feel grim inside as he moves towards the dressing rooms. 

People greet him still, however. How they’ve not forgotten him is beyond him.

Jaime Lannister pats him on the shoulder as he passes Jon, and Ygritte gives him a brilliant (albeit concerned) smile. Sandor Clegane gives him a wave from afar. The man doesn’t smile, but it’s near enough. He’s too gruff all the time. 

When he comes to stand in front of Tormund's office though, the door is closed. 

He can hear nothing from inside, but he knows the room is soundproof for confidentiality purposes. 

A moment passes, but then Val moves out, and there is Tormund, looking exactly the same as he always does, and it makes Jon want to weep in relief, even if he doesn’t really know why. 

A constant, unchanging, somehow. 

The little voice in Jon's head goes ‘And he has done a brilliant job of anchoring you, hasn't he? With his texts making sure you _eat_ alright.’) 

Val shouts, "See you at the bike session, this week's charity is one supporting Pansexuals," as she walks past him, throwing him a grin too. 

And Tormund laughs and replies with a booming "Sure, represent!" and smashes his fist against his chest reminiscent of the great ape in the film ‘King Kong’. 

Jon's head is thrown in for a loop, but he knew that. His trainer is pansexual, likes men. He has to reign in his inner voice squealing about that fact but does step closer to say hello to his trainer. 

"Jon! Do come in, just for a second," he gets let into the room with a brilliant smile. A wave of anxiety overcomes him. 

Fuck. Here it comes, the dreaded "intervention" for his missed sessions. He tries to get the feeling of trepidation back down, but he doesn't quite succeed, so he just grimaces in something that could only vaguely be described as a smile. 

They sit down, in front of each other. Jon slumps in the chair in front of Tormund's desk, fiddling with his hands. 

Seconds pass that seem like ages. For a moment, Jon is scared that the same Tormund that texted him with so much care and wit has vanished behind a mask of professionality. But why would he care for him? The man is still his trainer, for fuck's sake. He shouldn't care about Jon. Maybe it’s a normal thing for a trainer to do, do the checkups when someone isn’t coming. 

Tormund regards him, for a while, and he tries to stop the tears that threaten to come up. He hates this, hates interventions like these. 

With a sigh, Tormund starts and Jon steels himself. 

"This has to stop, Jon, you're exhausted and down with anxiety. I am still your trainer, you know, I'm trained to notice such things. " Tormund says, and he looks so earnest Jon wants to cry a little.

"I know," Jon replies quietly, jaw set.

"I know you probably hate this right now, but I am supposed to do this via the protocol." Tormund continues, forcing a small laugh out of Jon, "But I also want to help you because you're a great person, and I enjoy training with you." 

(‘He's said you're a great person’, the voice inside echoes and he wills it away, ‘He enjoys training with you’)

"I've managed to gauge the situation a bit from out texts, and I think we'll be able to manage this. Physical training is a good option against anxiety and stress, you've noticed that, haven't you?" 

Jon nods, unsure how or where this is going. 

"Now, this is not really me telling you to come to training more because I earn money from it, I just have a few suggestions, some food for thought if you will before we actually get back to training." 

Now Jon is really confused. What else can he offer Jon?

"So, I cannot help you with all the mental health stuff because I'm not a therapist or anything like that, but I can give you some pamphlets and recommend some people. I have one more suggestion, though. 

Jon nods at him to go on. Sure, he's considered it, and he's sure that he can get a few sessions with their family therapist again, and if not Robb probably has a list ready. Possibly even his mum. He's going back home this weekend, and she'll most likely just take one hard look at him and start pampering away. She just is like that. Pampering them with cookies and food and pulling them into hugging sessions on the sofa. They’ve been a bit distant, ever since Bran’s accident, but it’s been coming back slowly. 

Tormund's speaking on, ripping him from his thoughts. 

"...but my personal recommendation is that you get a service dog for anxiety. There are trained dogs for such things; you know," Tormund explains, handing over some brochures.

"I know, my little brother has one" Jon replies offhandedly, hoping he hadn't missed anything significant when he was zoned out. 

Tormund looks surprised. 

"Your little brother? Why?"

And Jon realises he somehow, in the past three months that he has known him, Jon's never told Tormund about Bran, so he does. About the accident, and his selective mutism, Bran's coming out, and his struggles in his wheelchair.

"Essentially, Mum brought it up, since Bran really wasn't in a good place after his accident, and Summer has really improved his mental health a lot."

"Summer?" Tormund asks

"Ah, that's what the dog is called," Jon replies.

"Alright, then. I see you already know about that option then." 

"Uh-huh."

Tormund sighs, giving him a sheepish smile and throws his arms up, as if in conclusion. 

"So, that was my tip for the day! I can support you by giving you meal plans that are easy for stressful times like I've already done the past one and a half weeks, and I can give you space to train, also, as a side note, you can bring dogs here too if you decide on it!"

That makes Jon curious. "Dogs? In the gym?" 

"Yeah, yeah, mostly when we're doing outside sessions in summer. But if it’s a service dog, of course they're allowed in! We're a barrier-free gym after all." 

"Ah, right," Jon remembers having read something about this when he started out. 

"So, now that the tirade is over, I'll see if I can get a smile on your face with some exercise!" Tormund grins manically, and Jon can't help but be affected, trying to not let the relief show too much on his face. 

And then somehow, magically, as if no time has passed, they are back to their usual trot. Not entirely though, since Tormund seems to actively avoid the genuinely tiring exercises. Jon studies his trainer's face, noticing the concern on his face still. 

At the end of the session, he does indeed feel a bit better, though, just like his trainer promised. He tells Tormund as much, who sighs in relief. 

"I'm glad, Jon."

"I'm glad too." 

And then, as an afterthought, Tormund adds "We are going to go to a pub Friday night, wanna join? It's most of us trainers and then some more regulars, you wouldn't be amiss!" 

Damnit. He wants to. But he's going back home on Friday afternoon already, his train tickets are booked already. 

"I can't" he sighs, trying not to look too disappointed." I'm going home for the weekend since Saturday is a holiday and we don't have training." 

"Ah yes, that's why we're out and about!"

"A shame, I'd love to come along." 

"And I'd love to have you there. It's a pub quiz, it's weekly, would do well to have such a smart person on my team." 

"Why are you so sure he'd be on your team, brother?" Ygritte chimes in from behind Tormund, grinning maniacally. "There's still the week after, you know." 

"It's a weekly session." Tormund turns back to Jon after throwing Ygritte a look. 

Jon has to grin. 

"I'd love to join then." He smiles, trying to stop his heart from beating too quick. 

(‘He called you smart, he wants you on his team’- the voice chants inside)

Tormund beams back, and the image follows him all the way back home and into his dreams. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a while! Tell me what you think? (Chapter 10 is close!) Leave me a comment they fuel me! Kudos are much appreciated!


	10. Chapter 10 : Jon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to @louhetar for the beta!!

Jon feels overcome with melancholy the moment his bus pulls into their street. He grew up here. Walked to school, played football in the streets with Robb and Theon. In winter they had snowball fights, and when their fingers were icy, mum would have hot cocoa for them.

The forest isn't that far off either, starting a few leagues behind their house.

When Jon gets off the bus, he's surprised to see his mum, waiting in the small bus stop with Nymeria and Shaggydog on a leash. 

The two malamutes were added into the family years ago for his two youngest siblings because there were some childish tantrums involved when Bran got Summer after his accident. 

Now, since Arya and Rickon are at school, their mum walks the dogs, she only works part-time, so she has today off. She's a lawyer, just like dad.

The moment the dogs notice it's Jon, they're bound his way, yapping and squeaking happily. 

Only seconds later Catelyn is there too, wrapping him into a hug. 

"Hey, mum" Jon rasps into her shoulder, immediately feeling like a little boy again.

Her hugs just do that to him. 

"Hey yourself. I thought I'd come to get you, the dogs needed a little walk." She replies, ruffling his hair. She gestures for him to give her his backpack, so he just has to carry his overnight bag, still standing at his feet. 

Jon kneels down to greet the dogs, and immediately Nymeria tries to jump on him. Shaggydog loses interest fast. Nymeria was always closer to him because he and Arya spent lots of time together when he was still home. 

"Come on, take that rascal and let's get home. Have you eaten?" Catelyn gestures at Nymeria's leash, and they're on their way. 

"No, not yet." 

"That's good, I'm making sausages, your favourite food," She says, with a completely straight face. 

"Mum no." Jon groans, although a small grin overtakes his face, "really?" 

She laughs out loud, "You should have seen your face. Yes, really, Arya suggested it."

"Arya," Jon laments, already preparing himself for a weekend of teasing, "Mum,  _ please _ , that pun is seriously getting old." 

"Tell that to your sister." 

They both chuckle at that and continue onwards towards their house. 

It's at the end of the road, and only a small field lined with fruit trees separates it from the woods. It's rather big, an old farmhouse with stables that are now converted into a garage. It's also where the dogs usually sleep, apart from Summer who sleeps with Bran in case he needs help. 

Now, only his parents and the three youngest live at home. He and Robb have long moved out, and Sansa is currently trekking the world in a gap year, but she's soon to return. She's nineteen now, aspiring fashion designer. 

That means that Arya is the oldest child at home now at seventeen years old. She's going to finish school soon, just one more year to go. Bran is close behind her at fifteen, and their baby brother Rickon is bound to reach puberty any time now at eleven years old. 

Arya and Rickon are still at school, he supposes when they get into the house, and he's not immediately tackled by his younger siblings. There is, however, a large dog careening into him. Summer. 

That means Bran's home. 

"He's had a bad night," Catelyn says, releasing Shaggydog from his leash. 

Immediately, Jon's concerned. He kicks off his shoes and removes Nymeria's leash, and moves in search of his brother, Summer close on his heels. 

He finds him in the living room, sunk into the soft sofa under heaps and heaps of blankets. 

The moment Bran sees him, he puts down his book-  **'** A Brief History of Time' By Stephen Hawking- and a small carefree smile flits across his face. 

"Jon! You're home," his little brother calls out and tries to move to greet him, but Jon's already there, wrapping him into a hug. 

"Hi champ," he replies into Bran's dark curls, so similar to his own. 

After a few moments, Bran extricates himself from the hug, and Jon settles in next to him, under the blanket when his brother raises it in offer. 

He leans against the smaller body, cuddling close. 

"How was the journey?" 

"Good, nothing major happened, just listened to music," Jon says, and then asks, "How come you're home?" 

"Bad night. Woke up with cramps and the pain was too much to go to school. Am doing heat therapy," he gestures at the blankets and the hot water bottle outlined through it. 

"Ah."

Suddenly, they're interrupted by Summer. He's sniffing around their feet, and Jon immediately makes some room if the service dog needs to get to Bran. Sometimes he notices panic attacks way earlier than Bran himself. 

To his surprise, the dog ends up sniffing at  _ him  _ more, carefully climbing into his lap, not his little brother’s, lying across Jon's chest and carefully licking at him. 

"Seems like he missed me," Jon mutters, starting to stroke the wolfdog a bit, noting how soft the fur feels.

A few moments pass and Summer doesn't move, settling further onto his lap. 

After a while, he notices that Bran has gone quiet and turns back to look at him. 

His little brother is staring at him, with his "something-is-wrong-and-I-can't-figure-it-out' face. It's quite rare, usually only reserved for his astronomy hobby. 

"You're-" he pauses, eyes squinted, thinking, flitting between Jon and Summer perched on his lap, "You're not doing well,  _ again _ ." 

Jon sighs. There's no hiding it now, Bran's gonna figure everything out. After Robb, Bran knows him best, even more than his parents or Arya, who comes next. It's because they both got so close after Bran's accident. Might as well tell, then. 

"No, I'm not." 

"Do you want to talk to me about it?" he sounds so concerned, and Jon has to avoid his eyes. 

"I-" He has to pause, he must, thinking about it is just gonna make the tears come again. 

Bran motions, and like on autopilot Jon lies down, his head on Bran's lap, Summer adjusting to rest on his chest. He starts playing with Jon's dark curls, waiting for him. 

He closes his eyes and recounts. 

From his botched presentation, Robb trying to calm him down, to him spending long days in the library without barely eating and sleeping, his constant panic attacks in between, spent either at home in bed or in bathrooms at uni, his cancelling of his trainings with Tormund and other obligations. The anxiety that leaves him exhausted and sad and gasping for a break. 

Then, he's done, and he quiets. The warm weight on his chest never moves, and neither do the long slender fingers from his hair. For a long while, Bran holds the silence but never stops soothing his fingers through his hair. 

"I'm sorry," Bran whispers after a moment, "Thank you for telling me." 

Jon opens his eyes to look at him. 

"You think I should go to visit the therapist?" 

"Yes. It hasn't been so bad that Summer noticed you feeling down since after I had my accident." 

"Hmm." 

"Robb could go with you." 

"If he wants to." 

"And you should ask after a service dog." 

"You're the second person telling me that this week," Jon says, trying to ignore the tingly feeling in his chest that comes whenever he thinks of Tormund these days. 

How he has become 'Tormund' in his mind so quickly is still baffling to him.

"Oh?" 

And Jon recants his conversation with his trainer, not leaving out anything, explaining Tormund's role in getting him to his presentation in time and his constant reassuring texts reminding him to eat when it got bad again. 

"I think he's right about the service dog. I mean, he gets the benefit of the doubt because he sees you like three times a week, but I am your brother, I  _ know  _ you. At least think about it?" 

"Yeah." Jon nods. "I will." 

A warm silence washes over them again, and Jon is relieved he's told his younger brother. 

After a moment though, the fingers in his hair pause.

"You're in love with him." 

"Yes." 

The reply is out of his mouth before he knows it, and quickly Jon throws his hand across his mouth, opening his eyes in shock. It's true though, he knows. He's infatuated, crushing hard. Might as well admit it to himself. 

Bran giggles and Jon is so sure his head is red, with how hot it feels. 

"That seemed like you didn't know it yet, dear brother." 

"Fuck off." Jon grouses and tries to hide his face behind his hands. That doesn't stop his brother from teasing him, though.

"Your  _ personal trainer _ , Jon. Really? Is he hot?" he teases, grinning down at him. 

Jon grimaces, half in pain, half in humour.

"You don't even know, he's so muscular." 

"You got pics?" 

"No." 

"What's his name?" 

"Tormund-"

"-Giantsbane, Free Folk Fitness?" Bran finishes his sentence, his phone in hand, "Oh, he  _ is."  _

"Oh my god, Bran, did you google him?" Jon tries to get up, to get to Bran's phone, but he holds it away from him. Why on earth has his little brother such long arms? 

Summer is inconveniently still perched on his chest, but after some wriggling, he jumps off. 

"Bran, give it-" 

Bran just cackles and starts reading the page.

"Tormund Giantsbane, 26 years old, Bachelor's degree in Physical Science, Apprenticed and Certified Personal Fitness Trainer, Certified  _ Massage Therapist-"  _

_ "Bran-"  _

"Ohh, picked a good one." Bran relents and gives the phone to Jon. 

God. They sure did choose a good picture of his trainer for the website, friendly, smiling and open-faced. He's in a black muscle shirt, the tight fabric showcasing his arms and chest, the red hair loose and spilling down, beard full but not too long. 

And of course, the description. Jon's eyes hover over the word "Certified Massage Therapist" for a while. He did  _ not  _ know that, in his time spent at the gym. 

He catches himself, those are thoughts for later at night. He scrolls on; literally everything is listed here, all the certifications. Sort of like a CV, but he guesses they have to register everything.

'First Aid certified, certification in cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR) and automated external defibrillators (AED), Experience with disabled clients (Not Rehabilitation), Experience with Service Dogs.'

Bran is snorting next to him and elbows him, Jon elbows back, transfixed. 

"Hobbies; Cycling, Martial Arts, Cooking." Bran reads out loud, wheezing, " _ Jon, _ he's your type. Have you asked him out yet?" 

Ah, the dreaded reminder that he's not even  _ allowed to;  _ to flirt, to do anything at all. 

"Nope. Can't" he sighs, handing the phone back dejectedly.

Bran raises his brows.

"Why? You're not usually this shy, you've been out nearly eight years now. You're a proficient gay," his little brother says, wiggling his eyebrows at his joke. 

"Because it's in the contract. No relationships between clients and employees, as per the clause." 

"Oh shit. That sucks." Bran sobers, becoming pensive.

"Yeah." 

"...And after?" 

"I don't know if it wouldn't be too awkward then. We're kinda, friends?"

"You'll be fine. The man is texting you, daily, that's not normal trainer activities, is it?" 

Jon doesn't know. He lies back down, slumping into the couch. He's glad that Bran's legs don't get sore, he is probably quite heavy, resting on him like this. 

Eyes closed, he tries not to think about it anymore. It does make him quite sad. He needs a distraction. 

"What about you and Jojen then, huh?" he peeps up at Bran through his eyelashes, "Any new developments?" 

"What news should there be? We're together, that's it." 

Jon waggles his eyebrows. 

Bran watches him, unimpressed, matching their dad's poker face one on one, but a small smile lingers in the corners of his mouth. 

Their antics get interrupted when Catelyn comes into the living room, a mouthwatering smell wafting after her out of the kitchen

"Boys, we can eat soon, I imagine the Arya and Rickon will be back soon. Jon, help Bran get ready?" 

"Yes, mum," they chorus and get up. 

No less than 5 minutes later, Bran has gotten situated in his wheelchair with Jon’s help, and they make their way into the kitchen. 

It's nearly 4.30 pm now, school finishes around 4 pm, so his siblings should return soon. 

He's unsure if his father would come for dinner too, but one look at the table tells him most likely not, as it's just set for five. 

He joins Catelyn in bustling around the kitchen, adding sauces to the tables and drinks.

Before long, he hears the doorbell ring and Catelyn gestures, so he quickly walks to the front of the house to greet his siblings. 

He opens the door and steels himself. Not to anyone's surprise, Arya tries to tackle him down, but now he's got the trump card. He's much stronger due to his training with Tormund and quickly sweeps her up instead, relishing in the squeak she lets out as he throws her over his shoulder.

"Jon, let me down, you dick-"

"Language," says Rickon, brushing past them inside and wildly kicking off his shoes into every direction. 

"Rickon, shoes" Jon replies, ruffling through his light curls as the pre-teen puts his shoes into place grumbling.

Arya is drumming her hands on his back by now so he lets her down onto the floor gently. 

"You trained." She squints her eyes at him, and Jon laughs. 

"Hello Jon, I'm so glad you are back, I missed you, how was your journey?" He impersonates her with a grin, and she hits him into the stomach gently. 

"Shut up, you already know that I missed you, now how come you've been training? You've not been doing shit with Robb, I know that." 

" _ Language _ , Arya!" comes Catelyn's voice out of the kitchen, and Arya rolls her eyes. 

She kicks off her shoes and drops her backpack, following Jon into the kitchen.

"He's registered himself at a Gym," Bran explains in his stead, as they all settle in. 

Bran's at the head of the table, then Rickon and Arya on his one side, and Jon sits next to Mum.

He's opposite Arya, who's eyeing him up with squinted eyes. 

"I did, it's been like a couple of weeks now," Jon says, evenly, hoping that it will stay at this. 

"And he's already nursing a crush on his trainer." 

Arya breaks out into a smirk at that, and Jon groans, letting his head fall into his head. Leave it to Bran to tell it to his entire family. 

"Jon has a crush," Arya singsongs, waggling her eyebrows at him, "He wants that sausage."

She holds up one of her sausages with her fork and wiggles it around a bit.

"Arya" Catelyn admonishes, but Jon's already looped in. 

"Jon has a crush, and he can't get that sausage  _ because he's my trainer. _ " He replies dryly and kicks her under the table.

"Why?" 

"There's a no relationship clause in the contract, so there's nothing I can do." 

"Oh, stop being so lawful, a little kiss doesn't hurt no one." 

"Oh leave your brother be, Arya," it comes from his right, and his mum puts her hand on his arm. 

Arya quiets, and the topic changes, but she never stops waggling her eyebrows. Sometimes, when mum isn't paying attention, she's waving the sausage at him. 

She's always been teasing him, but she means well, Jon knows. 

When they're done, Catelyn shoos the two younger ones into their rooms for homework, and Bran returns to his astrophysics book. 

The kitchen clean and his siblings gone, he and Catelyn come to stand in the room, and he knows now he's in for motherly question time. 

"Coffee?" 

"Please." 

"Robb's met him." Jon starts, settling down onto the kitchen sofa. 

"And what does he think?" 

"I think he likes him." 

"That's good. Why did they meet already? You're not usually this quick in letting Robb meet your crushes." Mum hands him his coffee, settling down next to him. 

"We went to train together three weeks ago, just for fun, and my trainer was there too." 

"Ah." 

"He's pansexual, like Bran." 

"So you've got a chance?" 

"Maybe." 

"I'm sure you do." She strokes his cheek, smiling at him. "You're my pretty son, I bet you could wrap him around your finger." 

"He's my trainer, mum, I'm not allowed to flirt with him." he sighs, taking a deep sip. 

"There's always after," she shrugs, "I'm sure you'll figure something out with that smart head of yours." 

"Hmm." 

Silence falls over them, but he knows there's still something on his mum’s mind. He leaves her some time to gather her words. 

"Jon," She starts, "I'm sorry if it wasn't meant for my ears, but I overheard you and Bran earlier. I can call the therapist for an appointment if you want? If I do it, you might get in sooner." 

Jon chuckles. Leave it to his mum to try and use her connections to help him. 

"It's okay. I'm surprised Robb didn't call you earlier." 

"Love, Robb's your twin, he wouldn't breathe a word to me if he merely got the vibes from you that you didn't want anyone to know." 

"Yeah, true." 

"So, can I call?" 

He nods, maybe it will be easier if he lets his family help him. He dutifully hands her his notebook that includes his schedule and allows her to weave her magic. She can be wonderfully efficient. 

He could call himself, he knows, but- 

Might as well let her. He's got the stubborn gene from her. If she has set her mind to something, it will happen. 

Not ten minutes later she hands him back his notebook, her neat handwriting marking a date two weeks from now, a Friday. 

"I chose a Friday, maybe you can take Robb with?" 

"If he has time." 

"If not, I have that day off too." 

"Thanks, mum." 

"Anytime, love." 

They settle in on the sofa, and Catelyn starts telling him about her week, what his siblings got up to and her friends, and some new drama at work. 

It seems like dad has a long day today because even when they go to bed later that evening, he's not home yet. 

Jon settles into his bed, in his childhood room, watching the walls littered with posters, remnants from his childhood, and finally lets himself breathe. 

That wasn't so hard. Maybe there is hope for the future. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look at me!!! Actually writing!!! :D Leave me a comment! How do you like the Starks?

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Please leave kudos or a comment if you liked it !


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